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Daggers

The joke thread

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
50 minutes ago, TiffToff88 said:

That reminds me of one of the most irritatingly catchy songs in existence:

 

 

my kids love this , it drives me nuts lol here's a couple more of their favourites 

 

 

ajthefox

ajthefox

Posted
Posted
58 minutes ago, TiffToff88 said:

That reminds me of one of the most irritatingly catchy songs in existence:

 

 

YES!! Love the duck song.

Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

A chap walks into a fish and chip shop and says "Can I get a steak and kidley pie please?"

 

Bloke behind the counter replies "I think you mean a steak and kidney pie"

 

Chap goes...."Well that's what I said diddle I?"

It got zero reaction. 

Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
13 minutes ago, Beliall said:

It got zero reaction. 

What can I say mate - it's the way you tell em!!

Anyway, hope you enjoyed your Maths lesson today lol

Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

What can I say mate - it's the way you tell em!!

Anyway, hope you enjoyed your Maths lesson today lol

It was quite hard so miss said I could just draw

  • Like 1
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

A chap walks into a fish and chip shop and says "Can I get a steak and kidley pie please?"

 

Bloke behind the counter replies "I think you mean a steak and kidney pie"

 

Chap goes...."Well that's what I said diddle I?"

 

9 hours ago, Beliall said:

Am I missing something or is this from @the fox 's big book of jokes

 

7 hours ago, Countryfox said:

Sorry Muzzett, cr@p joke before ....     but good one liner afterwards !    :thumbup:

 

58fe4cc2f1a69_nofromme.jpg.c1fa5fef7f58371be5532604bcaac752.jpg

  • Like 1
Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

 

58fe4cc2f1a69_nofromme.jpg.c1fa5fef7f58371be5532604bcaac752.jpg

You've hurt my feelings once again Buce :(

I'm thinking the two reps the joke got may just be for effort (or maybe out of sympathy lol)

Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

You've hurt my feelings once again Buce :(

 

:( You're one of my favourite people, Izzy - but please don't give up the day job..

 

Quote

I'm thinking the two reps the joke got may just be for effort (or maybe out of sympathy lol)

 

But one of them was from the fox.... nuff said. lol

Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, Countryfox said:

 

Get a bloody room ! ....

 

                        Don't take it so hard, CF..

 

             jealousy.jpg.1eddb0cd50d7aafb8f62658f1b4c3148.jpg

  • Like 2
Trav Le Bleu

Trav Le Bleu

Posted
Posted
27 minutes ago, Izzy Muzzett said:

You've hurt my feelings once again Buce :(

I'm thinking the two reps the joke got may just be for effort (or maybe out of sympathy lol)

It's one of my favourites, if a bit old.

  • Like 1
Tuna

Tuna

Posted
Posted

The price of goods in supermarkets these days.

 

I mean look at a box of tampons, a bloody tena.

the fox

the fox

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Buce said:

 

:( You're one of my favourite people, Izzy - but please don't give up the day job..

 

 

But one of them was from the fox.... nuff said. lol

When you're just minding your business but FT finds a way to drag you to make fun of you....again!

58fe927c8b638_images(12).jpg.fd6a414118691322d7d10c71e0a72787.jpg

 

 

Well, I actually like Izzy and his joke wasn't half bad.

  • Like 3
Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, the fox said:

When you're just minding your business but FT finds a way to drag you to make fun of you....again!

58fe927c8b638_images(12).jpg.fd6a414118691322d7d10c71e0a72787.jpg

 

 

Well, I actually like Izzy and his joke wasn't half bad.

We all like Izzy, but the joke was shit....

cambridgefox

cambridgefox

Posted
Posted
On 24 April 2017 at 10:56, Izzy Muzzett said:

A chap walks into a fish and chip shop and says "Can I get a steak and kidley pie please?"

 

Bloke behind the counter replies "I think you mean a steak and kidney pie"

 

Chap goes...."Well that's what I said diddle I?"

Soccer AM Tim Lovejoy always used to say it.

lad I used to work with surname was Kidney,and so I used to call him Kidley and await to be corrected by someone.

He began to despise me!

  • Like 1
  • Popular Post
Stadt

Stadt

Posted
  • Popular Post
Posted

from reddit

 

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" 

The man replies "I just found out my wife is sleeping with another man. I've decided I'm going to drink myself to death." 

The bartender looks shocked and says "I'm sorry I can't help you kill yourself." 

The man asks "Well what would you do in my situation?"

The bartender puffs himself up a bit and says "If I found out a guy was sleeping with my wife I wouldn't sit around feeling sorry for myself, I'd kill the guy."

The man jumps up from his stool and shouts "That's a great idea! Thanks!" and runs out of the bar.

A couple hours goes by and the bartender is starting to get nervous when the man walks back into the bar with a smile on his face.

"Did you kill the guy?" The bartender asks nervously.

"Nope! I slept with your wife. Whiskey please."

  • Like 6
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Wookie said:

from reddit

 

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" 

The man replies "I just found out my wife is sleeping with another man. I've decided I'm going to drink myself to death." 

The bartender looks shocked and says "I'm sorry I can't help you kill yourself." 

The man asks "Well what would you do in my situation?"

The bartender puffs himself up a bit and says "If I found out a guy was sleeping with my wife I wouldn't sit around feeling sorry for myself, I'd kill the guy."

The man jumps up from his stool and shouts "That's a great idea! Thanks!" and runs out of the bar.

A couple hours goes by and the bartender is starting to get nervous when the man walks back into the bar with a smile on his face.

"Did you kill the guy?" The bartender asks nervously.

"Nope! I slept with your wife. Whiskey please."

 

WEBBO!!!

 

Either The Fox or Izzy has hacked Wookie's account..

  • Like 2
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted (edited)
2 minutes ago, Countryfox said:

 

We need a 'Crap Jokes Thread' ....   :)

 

Looks like we've already got one. :)

Edited by Buce
  • Like 4
Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Buce said:

 

WEBBO!!!

 

Either The Fox or Izzy has hacked Wookie's account..

Image result for that's it I've had it with you

  • Popular Post
Tuna

Tuna

Posted
  • Popular Post
Posted

I had a car accident today, I went right into the back of a Mercedes.

 

The driver got out and happened to be a dwarf.

 

'I'm not happy' he said.

 

I replied 'Which one are you?'.

  • Like 6

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