Itsthejoeker Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 This was in my local paper a couple of months ago. THE SAM MORSHEAD COLUMN: How to survive a football forum6:00am Saturday 29th June 2013 in Sport This is our way of expressing ourselves nowadays - on keyboards behind pseudonyms in a somewhat perverse, cult-like display of anonymity and ritual.MORE and more it appears as though football’s online community is developing cliques, definable sections of a community which revolves around the courting of controversy, outlandish statements, self-defence and, in some cases, total and utter b*****ks. Strangely, these sections of online society have managed to create for themselves cliques - very definable groups of individuals with similar characteristics and qualities. They bond together and hunt in packs, a tribal dynamic in technology. For first-timers dipping their toes into this world it can be very confusing. Therefore, here’s a handy guide. 1. “The Happy Clappers†- formerly a fairweather fan, this section of the forum community is generally positive and susceptible to delusion. Expect to see the phrases “give it time†and “at least it’s better than†on a regular basis. Generally calm and withdrawn, the most relaxed of all the cliques can suddenly explode in a fit of rage at the mention of being a “Happy Clapperâ€. 2. “The Moaner†- Fierce rivals of the “Happy Clapperâ€, the Moaner generally thinks everything is crap. Contradictory and self-defeating, he doesn’t understand the word hypocritical and, even if he did, wouldn’t acknowledge it as a real word. 3. “The WUM or Wind-Up Merchant†- Often confused with a moaner, the WUM has an agenda to incite and inflame a situation. Feeds off the anger and irritation of others and thrives in negative environments. Will frequently state the absurd in search of a reaction. WUMs, unlike Happy Clappers and Moaners, are not pack animals. They hunt alone, often at the most antisocial hours, in an attempt to catch the inebriated off-guard. 4. “The Troll†- A devolved variant of the WUM. The troll has his ethics and morals surgically removed at birth. He will scour the online savannah for the most vulnerable prey and strike with ruthless malice. Shunned by all sections of the forum community, Trolls are rare. 5. “The ITK or In The Know†- Generally a bored adolescent struggling with puberty, the ITK is perhaps the newest species to have evolved out of the forum environment. Smug to the verge of pomposity, he will chew up media speculation and online gossip and regurgitate it all in one, largely implausible rumour. Frequently ITKs spread their wings to Twitter in sense of more attention, which they are largely given by the younger and less experienced “Happy Clappers†and “Moanersâ€. 6. “The Cynic†- The elders of the community, Cynics are usually techno-friendly 40-plussers who have become world-weary and simply will not accept any view other than their own. Friendly with both Moaners and Happy Clappers, but only when they share the same opinion, Cynics can provide legitimate insight and untranslatabale gibberish depending on the number of whiskys before bedtime.
Stadt Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 Haha very true, there are some decent posters on her though! I'm probably a happy clapper!
Dan Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 I'm 20 years old and I'm probably number 6 for piss sake.
Guest MattP Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 A combination of 3 and 6. I revert between being a moaner and a happy clapper, I'm the latter under Nigel but was the former under Sven.
Alf Bentley Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 The description for 6 sounds pretty close to home (but "Intransigent", not "Cynic", surely?), with a light seasoning of 3 (WUM). Definitely way over on the Happy Clapper side, not a Moaner ....optimism just makes life more enjoyable - you only have brief periods of intense disappointment to deal with, instead of constant misery and angst.
Basingstoke Fox Posted 22 October 2013 Posted 22 October 2013 So this actually isn't just FoxesTalk? I'm probably 1.
StanSP Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 1. Definitely have my altercations/arguments with 2. Can definitely name a few 2's, too.
Darkon84 Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 Probably a bit of 1 and 6 really. The description of the 'ITK' fans is fantastic, can definitely picture one or two from here like that. Might be a few bruised ego's now.
Guest shearfox Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 Im probably 6, the whiskey thing is certainly correct...
Fox42 Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 I'm 1 and 3. How has only one person said 2 yet? You're all lying
MC Prussian Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 I'm 1, with a little bit of 2 inside of me. Don't mind a whisky every now and then, though. I'M NOT CYNICAL!!!
Trumpet Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 I'm number 2. You're definitely number 3 hahaha
Vlad the Fox Posted 23 October 2013 Posted 23 October 2013 The description for 6 sounds pretty close to home (but "Intransigent", not "Cynic", surely?), with a light seasoning of 3 (WUM). Definitely way over on the Happy Clapper side, not a Moaner ....optimism just makes life more enjoyable - you only have brief periods of intense disappointment to deal with, instead of constant misery and angst. I have to agree with this. The last euro's for the first time, I was of the feeling that we wouldn't do any good and as a result didn't enjoy it any where near as much failing to get half as excited for it as my blind optimism 'we're gonna win it' tournaments. Insanely I only started to get 'the feeling' during our penalty shootout, we were out two kicks later. So now I'm in the blind optimism camp, it's so much more fun and like you say the lows hit hard but optimism is a bitch for bashing the blues away.
The Blur Posted 24 October 2013 Posted 24 October 2013 Come on guys- name and shame people in no.2 category!
_Fatboyslow_ Posted 24 October 2013 Posted 24 October 2013 Can you be a troll and a cynic at the same time with a little added WUM
kingfox Posted 24 October 2013 Posted 24 October 2013 No Banter King option. Course not, because I'm the only one in the country.
MC Prussian Posted 24 October 2013 Posted 24 October 2013 No Banter King option. Course not, because I'm the only one in the country. Pretty easy when there's no one else competing.
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