Depression

[SecretPro]

I can understand why some people decide to live a double life. 

[ajthefox]

On 31/03/2023 at 23:42, SecretPro said:

I can understand why some people decide to live a double life. 

Why is it that you can understand it now?

[urban.spaceman]

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Edited 3 April 2023 by urban.spaceman

[urban.spaceman]

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Edited 3 April 2023 by urban.spaceman

[chrishlcfc]

Feel In absolute despair as usual. Just want to give up on life. So so so close to just going out and doing that. Can’t take the suffering any longer. I try to get better but always always just end up back at route one. Can’t take anymore setbacks.

[Crinklyfox]

3 hours ago, chrishlcfc said:

Feel In absolute despair as usual. Just want to give up on life. So so so close to just going out and doing that. Can’t take the suffering any longer. I try to get better but always always just end up back at route one. Can’t take anymore setbacks.

Chris, for those of us who are prone to depression there will likely always days and periods when everything seems hopeless.  It's hard to get through those days.  If you can, try looking back over the past times in your life and seriously work out how often you've felt this bad and compare it to the amount of time you've felt able to go on  and experience some good times.  It helps with perspective because although you may think that everything is hopeless now in reality, unless you have an incurable and degenerative illness, there are likely to be better times ahead.  

 

Many of us who post on this thread have suffered from depression and felt the way you do.  The fact that we're still here is testament to two things which may not seem obvious right now; firstly, that depression can be controlled in many cases; and secondly, that there is a life worth having after the depths of despair.  I hope that you can get through this and join us.

[TJQuik]

Been doing better than normal and finally reaching out for help so I'm strongly considering taking a break from football to keep this going.

[TJQuik]

On 04/04/2023 at 23:25, TJQuik said:

Been doing better than normal and finally reaching out for help so I'm strongly considering taking a break from football to keep this going.

...well that went well, I sacked it off for about a day! Still doing alright though.

[ozleicester]

Exhausted, there are too many others issues that i have to carry the weight of.

[SecretPro]

Feeling so, so bad again lately. Got so much going on, a large chunk of it in my head. I'm not sure what else I can do at this point. I have everything, I should be happy. I'm just not. I'm so unhappy. 

[HighPeakFox]

7 hours ago, SecretPro said:

Feeling so, so bad again lately. Got so much going on, a large chunk of it in my head. I'm not sure what else I can do at this point. I have everything, I should be happy. I'm just not. I'm so unhappy. 

Do you have someone you can sit down and talk with, my friend?

[HybridFox]

Does anyone else get really triggered when guests turn up to the house unannounced?

 

I kinda feel like I don't come across very welcoming in that situation. But I just feel so flustered in my mind like I wasn't expecting you to be here, I haven't prepared anything etc

 

Then feel bad later that I could have offered them more things

Edited 2 May 2023 by HybridFox

[weller54]

On 31/03/2023 at 23:42, SecretPro said:

I can understand why some people decide to live a double life. 

Life's complicated enough trying to navigate through one set of problems nevermind two!!

[urban.spaceman]

Starting to slip again. Struggling to see a future and not enjoying anything in my life at the minute. Football isn't helping. This is going to be a rough few weeks.

[String fellow]

18 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Starting to slip again. Struggling to see a future and not enjoying anything in my life at the minute. Football isn't helping. This is going to be a rough few weeks.

Me too buddy. In April, I lost a very close and much-loved relative. The sense of loss is truly horrendous, and something I'll never fully recover from. 

[foxfanazer]

19 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Starting to slip again. Struggling to see a future and not enjoying anything in my life at the minute. Football isn't helping. This is going to be a rough few weeks.

Stay strong mate. I've been on the brink of giving up before and literally took no joy from anything. Things do and will get better (not necessarily LCFC related sadly)

 

Inbox is always open my friend

Edited 12 May 2023 by foxfanazer

[HighPeakFox]

20 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Starting to slip again. Struggling to see a future and not enjoying anything in my life at the minute. Football isn't helping. This is going to be a rough few weeks.

I've dropped the football, essentially. It is simply not a reliable entity for a person like me to invest in. 

[Jimothy]

21 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Starting to slip again. Struggling to see a future and not enjoying anything in my life at the minute. Football isn't helping. This is going to be a rough few weeks.

Don't know about the other parts of your life but if you feel the need to share there's this thread and all our inboxes, you know we're all ready to lend an ear.

 

As for the football, i know its difficult when supporting the team is a big part of your life and it seem strange to celebrate the highs so much and not be equally cut up about the lows but you sort of have to. I'm disappointed by this season but don't hang your happiness on the football club, it'll mostly let you down. Also we've been here and worse before, it'll get better and it's totally out of all our control.

[foxfanazer]

6 hours ago, HighPeakFox said:

I've dropped the football, essentially. It is simply not a reliable entity for a person like me to invest in. 

I'm trying to learn to do this too. Can't have my weekends moods hinging on 11 overpaid footballers. Such a hard mentality to shift from though when it's been your life for so long 

[urban.spaceman]

16 hours ago, String fellow said:

Me too buddy. In April, I lost a very close and much-loved relative. The sense of loss is truly horrendous, and something I'll never fully recover from. 

I'm so sorry for your loss String. Especially with it being just last month, it must be still so raw. We lost my dad's closest friend of 65 years in early December and it just doesn't feel real still. He was so close to our family, practically a free uncle, who you'd always have over when doing a house or garden DIY project not just for the help but to also hang around with. Even typing this now I'm in tears just thinking about him. I'd give anything to just hear his voice, his laugh or even the same story I'd heard a thousand times before (I used to call it 'Nostalgia Mode'). He deserved so much better.

[String fellow]

2 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

I'm so sorry for your loss String. Especially with it being just last month, it must be still so raw. We lost my dad's closest friend of 65 years in early December and it just doesn't feel real still. He was so close to our family, practically a free uncle, who you'd always have over when doing a house or garden DIY project not just for the help but to also hang around with. Even typing this now I'm in tears just thinking about him. I'd give anything to just hear his voice, his laugh or even the same story I'd heard a thousand times before (I used to call it 'Nostalgia Mode'). He deserved so much better.

Sorry to hear about your loss. Since my own bereavement, it's been really difficulty to gain enthusiasm for anything much really. So much of our time is spent thinking about stuff (even football) that's not really that important compared with life itself.

[TJQuik]

I came across a video of this YouTube channel that interviews people from extremely deprived backgrounds - homeless people, drug addicts, sex workers etc. Frequently the guests will upload their own videos on the side, and over half the comments on their videos will be people tracking them down to spit the most vile abuse imaginable at them.

 

That's the world we live in - they can plaster all the "mental health awareness" or other advocacy posters they want in your office or supermarket but this just masks the truth - anyone experiencing moderate to severe mental health issues, trauma etc is treated as subhuman and beyond recovery.

[filthyfox]

Clenching jaw... tense neck and shoulders... interrupted sleep

Can mean only one thing...

 

Time to double the dose... right in time for relegation!!!

 

 

[Parafox]

Is there anyone else out there in FT land whose anxiety is so overwhelming that it results in vomiting?

 

It happens to me a lot since I retired. When I was working I never felt any hint of anxiety because I was mostly in control of the situations I found myself in. Now, I feel out of control even though I have a routine which I stick to quite rigidly. 

 

Waking up in the night and my mind is going over all the things I'm supposed to put aside, according to a counsellor, because I have no control over them. I'm trying to live "in the now" as much as I can but it's a struggle to get the worrisome thinking out of my head.

 

That's when I feel sick, and often am.

 

There are quite a lot of long term issues with our 2 adopted (now adult) daughters which are of real concern for the future.

Edited 15 May 2023 by Parafox

[Free Falling Foxes]

5 hours ago, Parafox said:

Is there anyone else out there in FT land whose anxiety is so overwhelming that it results in vomiting?

 

It happens to me a lot since I retired. When I was working I never felt any hint of anxiety because I was mostly in control of the situations I found myself in. Now, I feel out of control even though I have a routine which I stick to quite rigidly. 

 

Waking up in the night and my mind is going over all the things I'm supposed to put aside, according to a counsellor, because I have no control over them. I'm trying to live "in the now" as much as I can but it's a struggle to get the worrisome thinking out of my head.

 

That's when I feel sick, and often am.

 

There are quite a lot of long term issues with our 2 adopted (now adult) daughters which are of real concern for the future.

I guess working gave you time away from home stressors and that acted as a chance to boost your resilience?

 

I'm sitting here now, deliberately avoiding going to bed because I'll lie there worrying over my daughter too.

I'll wake up for my middle of the night pee, and will start worrying about her again and my concerns will be the first thing that hits me when I wake in the morning too.

I've had big worries over our children before but always managed to carry on working - I believe that helped.

However, I'm retiring next week and I'm concerned I'll have too much time and will worry even more because I'll have fewer distractions.

 

They say 'put aside' things you have no control over, but it's rarely that simple when it comes to your children.

 

I dont think you can get the 'worrisome' out of your mind but you need to at least replace it with something else from time to time, as much as is possible.

Edited 15 May 2023 by Free Falling Foxes