Kids. Why?

[ozleicester]

And if you're really, really lucky they won't be vegetarians.

 

 

too true... Raw Vegans leave veggies for dead 

[Ric Flair]

Why the bloody hell would anybody want to have kids?  Since I'm apparently "good with kids", I do the occasional bit of babysitting if my services are needed on a night I'm not working (every penny and all that) and it really makes me wonder what sort of mental defect you need to have in order to willingly bring forth offspring.  

 

Case in point: The kid I'm looking after tonight is all happy and cooperative when you're playing the mind-numbingly boring creation that is minecraft with him, or letting him watch some pointless video of guys commentating over videos of themselves playing the mind-numbingly boring creation that is minecraft.  (Minecraft is this kid's prozac.)  But ****ing hell. The second you ask him to turn whatever gadget he's using off and start getting ready for bed he will, without fail, start whining about some illness that he's suddenly decided he has, or suddenly starts complaining that he wants his mummy and refuses to cooperate.  Then some time after he's finally gone to bed he'll reappear with whichever of the previous complaints he hasn't used, or will claim he's had a nightmare when he clearly hasn't even been to sleep (why, just now he came down after having left to go upstairs 5(!) minutes previously and opened his new moan with "first of all, I went to sleep-". I cut him off right there to call bullshit in slightly softer language).  The thing that annoys me most about this is that it's, barring maybe one or two exceptions, always a blatant lie which I always see through and which he always repeats, and yet I have no idea what his endgame can possibly hope to be. Does he think that I'll say "aw, poor guy, you should stay awake and play some more of that boring crap you're obsessed with"?  If he does then he's not the brightest because in all the time I've babysat him it's never worked, so why keep trying?  And that's not even mentioning the number of times he tries to hide some gadget in his room to watch/play on which I have to physically, almost violently, tear from his hands when I catch him using it.  I'm not mean to him like I'm making myself sound.  I'm a very amicable guy towards him, which makes it worse. When I was his age I'd have seriously looked up to someone who was willing to play the pointless crap I was interested in.  Fvck I'll even occasionally give this child half an hour of my spare time to play stupid minecraft with him over the internet from my house on a server I've specifically set up for us just because I remember what it was like to be his age and wanting someone to play 'cool' games with(although I'm pretty much done with that shit the way this entitled brat behaves). This kid just thinks everyone's his fvcking servant and acts all pissy when he has to do the tiniest thing which disinterests him.

 

Who the f*** wants to deal with that shit on a daily basis?  Explain yourselves, parents.

 

Hahahahaa this is one of the best posts i've seen for a while. 99% of kids irritate me and I'm worried my own would do the same and I'd be a bad Dad. I'm sure if and when I have a little scrote of my own my opinions will change but until then I wish they'd bugger off. Riles me people who think it's their right to have a shit load of them and then cannot pay for them, I think we should be born without the ability to conceive and then you have to prove yourself worthy to be have a ' snip reversal ' so you can have a kid. It would solve a fair few issues the world currently faces.

[Rincewind]

Not a parent but I would think being one is something you learn as you go along not born with.

[Jace]

Our first is due in a few weeks and I'm really looking forward to it to be honest

[MooseBreath]

I don't have any kids yet but I'm getting to that age where the potential emptiness of life is becoming apparent and the idea of filling the void with a child is starting to sound like a good idea.

[lavrentis]

I'm 18 and can't wait to have kids 

 

 

Okay that was an exaggeration, I can wait a bit, but let's say I really can't imagine a future without 2 or more little 'me's running around breaking stuff 

God forbid, but I can't imagine how I'd live if I was told I couldn't have kids. I believe there's one or two who have mentioned on here that they have been told so, and it pained me to read it.

 

Adoption?

[Merging Cultures]

Everybody who insists on having children is really an egotist who wants to reproduce a better version of themselves...but won't admit it  .. all the rest is propaganda..

 

I for one won't conform..sorry..

 

Definitely! I married a beautiful Jamaican woman so my kids will grow up to be really good looking, great at dancing, and the boy will be hung!

 

No more pasty white, fat guys with small cocks in my immediate lineage!!

[Smudge]

Why the bloody hell would anybody want to have kids?  Since I'm apparently "good with kids", I do the occasional bit of babysitting if my services are needed on a night I'm not working (every penny and all that) and it really makes me wonder what sort of mental defect you need to have in order to willingly bring forth offspring.  

 

Case in point: The kid I'm looking after tonight is all happy and cooperative when you're playing the mind-numbingly boring creation that is minecraft with him, or letting him watch some pointless video of guys commentating over videos of themselves playing the mind-numbingly boring creation that is minecraft.  (Minecraft is this kid's prozac.)  But ****ing hell. The second you ask him to turn whatever gadget he's using off and start getting ready for bed he will, without fail, start whining about some illness that he's suddenly decided he has, or suddenly starts complaining that he wants his mummy and refuses to cooperate.  Then some time after he's finally gone to bed he'll reappear with whichever of the previous complaints he hasn't used, or will claim he's had a nightmare when he clearly hasn't even been to sleep (why, just now he came down after having left to go upstairs 5(!) minutes previously and opened his new moan with "first of all, I went to sleep-". I cut him off right there to call bullshit in slightly softer language).  The thing that annoys me most about this is that it's, barring maybe one or two exceptions, always a blatant lie which I always see through and which he always repeats, and yet I have no idea what his endgame can possibly hope to be. Does he think that I'll say "aw, poor guy, you should stay awake and play some more of that boring crap you're obsessed with"?  If he does then he's not the brightest because in all the time I've babysat him it's never worked, so why keep trying?  And that's not even mentioning the number of times he tries to hide some gadget in his room to watch/play on which I have to physically, almost violently, tear from his hands when I catch him using it.  I'm not mean to him like I'm making myself sound.  I'm a very amicable guy towards him, which makes it worse. When I was his age I'd have seriously looked up to someone who was willing to play the pointless crap I was interested in.  Fvck I'll even occasionally give this child half an hour of my spare time to play stupid minecraft with him over the internet from my house on a server I've specifically set up for us just because I remember what it was like to be his age and wanting someone to play 'cool' games with(although I'm pretty much done with that shit the way this entitled brat behaves). This kid just thinks everyone's his fvcking servant and acts all pissy when he has to do the tiniest thing which disinterests him.

 

Who the f*** wants to deal with that shit on a daily basis?  Explain yourselves, parents.

I was a young father and had similar problems with my son, in the end, I took the handle off the inside of his door, so make sure you take a screwdriver with you.

If I was you, I wouldn't set myself up as a play pal, you need to be above that and be more of a serious adult, I doubt his parents play with him, why would you? If he misbehaves, maybe there's a place he has to sit like a 'naughty chair' in the end threaten him with "Wait till your dad gets home" That worked a treat for my mum.

[Ross-Kemp]

My girlfriend has just given birth to my first born, let me tell you, no other feeling in the world compares.

[Bellend Sebastian]

I've got a kid - it's amazing, they'll literally let anyone have one now - and he is without a doubt the finest thing that has ever happened to me, better even than going to Imperial War Museum Duxford in 2007.

I have a bond with him that is like none I've ever known - I too have rolled my eyes at and thrown dirt into the faces of those that say the love you have for your children is on a different level to that which you have for anyone else, but I have to admit that they are correct and have written many grovelling letters of apology as a result.

 

As brilliant as this is, whether it's a good idea is dependent on a whole raft of things.  If there's even a slither of doubt over the robustness of your relationship, don't even think about it - those that have a child in the hope that it will shore up their shaky relationship are clutching at straws as the whole new world of stresses and strains thrown into the mix is more likely to do just the opposite. 

 

We have an easy kid, in the sense that he has a good nature, isn't a particularly fussy eater and has slept through the night from very early on, but it's still blooming hard work - throw in the old hormones etc which are a bit all over the shop for a good few months and you'll be at your wits end.  The hardest thing I've found is the management of your time - whereas before you could do what you want, when you wanted and then suddenly you just cannot, because there's another person in the house that needs you to do quite a lot of stuff and often at quite specific times.  It does dominate your life, which is why there's a risk that you become very tedious for other folk that aren't in the same boat, but some people are better at managing this than others.  We palmed our our kid off for the night onto his grandparents after a couple of months - I know of others that are nearly school age and have never been looked after by anyone other than mum or dad, and that's down to them rather than the kid, usually.

 

Probably the best thing about it though is having an excuse to watch Nina and the Neurons (although I was disappointed that Nina wore a polo shirt when going swimming - that's bollocks and frankly is cheating the licence payer).

 

Edit:  Congratulations Ross-Kemp, that's fine news

[Merging Cultures]

Probably the best thing about it though is having an excuse to watch Nina and the Neurons (although I was disappointed that Nina wore a polo shirt when going swimming - that's bollocks and frankly is cheating the licence payer).

 

Nina isn't as hot as Kat Sandion. She was presenting in her PJs on Saturday morning. She is a bit drama student keen, but I like the energy...

[Bellend Sebastian]

Nina isn't as hot as Kat Sandion. She was presenting in her PJs on Saturday morning. She is a bit drama student keen, but I like the energy...

 

I can actually almost agree with you there, Ms Sandion has the power to get the pulses racing, it cannot be denied.  Nina edges it though as it's not quite as terrible when she sings (although it's not great).

 

I try and ignore what my friend told me who was in turn talking to someone in the television industry that says that children's TV presenters are amongst the worst people in the industry for stabbing each other in the back to further their own careers.  I cannot imagine Kat and Nina doing that - but only because I'm refusing to

[Beliall]

sorry but massive .

hes just testing you. I doubt he gets away with any of it with his parents so he tries it on with you. that and you have fun doing cool things with him and he wants more. I pre warn my kids of impending bed times and they should prepare to stop playing. just saying thats it , stop now never works.

You'd be dead wrong there. Their 'placate him with technology' attitude is the exact reason he's developed this addiction to about 5 different gadgets, and from what I've seen, they rarely get him to finish dinner or finish his homework (whereas I rarely fail). I'm definitely firmer with him when it comes to quitting time. I'm also more cooperative with him before then(I guess that bit's easier when it's only for a few hours every now and then). None of that changes the fact that his attitude at bedtime pisses me right off!

fair enough.

[Trav Le Bleu]

[kingfox]

Now I have a job, I'm working with 3-4 year old's three days a week now.

 

It can be tiring, and some are difficult to handle, but it's the best job in the World and it's really enjoyable.

 

Would rather work with Children, than work in Retail. 

[Merging Cultures]

I can actually almost agree with you there, Ms Sandion has the power to get the pulses racing, it cannot be denied.  Nina edges it though as it's not quite as terrible when she sings (although it's not great).

 

I try and ignore what my friend told me who was in turn talking to someone in the television industry that says that children's TV presenters are amongst the worst people in the industry for stabbing each other in the back to further their own careers.  I cannot imagine Kat and Nina doing that - but only because I'm refusing to

 

I can see Kat doing it. I think her bright eyes and big smile hide a naughty, naughty girl...

 

Doesn't Nina have a Scottish accent... shudder.

 

According to wikipedia she does she even starred in Rab C Nesbitt - Series 9, episode 1 'Heal' - TV -(2010) – Dr. Lennox

[Bellend Sebastian]

I can see Kat doing it. I think her bright eyes and big smile hide a naughty, naughty girl...

 

Doesn't Nina have a Scottish accent... shudder.

 

According to wikipedia she does she even starred in Rab C Nesbitt - Series 9, episode 1 'Heal' - TV -(2010) – Dr. Lennox

 

She's very Scottish, there's no getting away from that.

 

Here's the actress in non-Nina mode, in an advert that brings us right back on topic, in that there's a baby in it:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibuLgsVcQUY

 

"Ye cannae call her fanny"

[Merging Cultures]

She's very Scottish, there's no getting away from that.

 

Here's the actress in non-Nina mode, in an advert that brings us right back on topic, in that there's a baby in it:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibuLgsVcQUY

 

"Ye cannae call her fanny"

Brilliant. Now, my wife will wonder why I am laughing my head off.

[DANGEROUS TIGER]

Great fun being a Dad. No need to look for excuses, while enjoying my second childhood.

[Bellend Sebastian]

Just spent last hour and a half cleaning toddler sick out of a car seat.

 

Even more rewarding than you can probably imagine

[MPH]

I was absolutely petrified at the thought of becoming a dad. I had been very used to doing what I wanted the idea of something so small being completely dependent on me was horrifying. What if I didn't know when he was hungry? What if I didnt get any sleep and had to spend 13 hours at work the next day? What if he puked all over me in the middle of a shopping trip? ( he's done all of the above).

As soon as he was born he had to go straight over to the incubator and they needed to work on him- he had a LOT of fluid in his lungs. After they had worked on him I went over to him as my wife recovered and just leaned over and said " hey there lil buddy.." as soon as a began speaking his eyes widened he stiffened Up and turned his head to me. "Wow." Said the nurse. " he obviously recognises your voice."

That was it. I was so totally loving my son from that moment on.. to see him smile at me for the first time melted my heart and when he said dada for the first time on father's day made me almost cry..

the way he is so excited when I get home from work.. and when I pick him up in the morning out of his cot....

I wouldn't swap the lifestyle for a billion pounds!

[sphericalfox]

Kids are great. I have two. I can't wait for some gems from my young lad once he gets talking

 

http://www.danoah.com/2013/10/32-more-of-the-creepiest-things-ever-said-by-kids.html

[Parafox]

I think the kid is playing Carl like a string quartet.

 

You should watch "The 3 Day Nanny"., channel 4

 

I adopted two girls, seperately, one at 2 and a half and the second at 3 months. The older one is now 21 and we have been through a living hell with her. Not entirely her fault as she has emotional and attachment problem to do with early life trauma, but i can tell you, I never want the last 18 years back. To my shame we had to put her back in care when she was 15 just so we could live some kind of normal life and keep the younger daughter safe. We have managed to support her from a distance and continue to do so but our relationship is pretty rubbish. Sadly she has recently made a number of attempts to harm herself and has OD'd twice, been sectioned recently and now is having "community support" (what a pile of crap that is). All due to what she experienced as a small child and the long term effects of it all.

 

Our younger daughter has been the complete opposite as she didn't go through any trauma and was put into care at birth. (not for any risk reasons) and has had as normal a childhood as we could give her. There will be issues ahead, no doubt, but nothing like the ones we've had to manage already.

 

So... Kids, why? 

 

Because we wanted kids, to be a family, to watch them grow and develop into their own people. For them to part of our lives and us of theirs. I just wish it hadn't been through adoption!

[Tielemans63]

As brilliant as it is there is a downside. I've been up feeding my daughter for the last hour and that's because half way through she did a shit so huge it'd make a horse blush.

[The People's Hero]

That is a strong word, but if I ever have a baby I like to think I'd make some effort not to become a total bore to everyone around me.

Why not start trying to make that positive change now?