Championship Footballer to come out as Gay next week

[stripeyfox]

fair play to the kid. Just listening to his interview on SkySports. Seems that everyone is being very supportive of him - especially his team mates and the club. It is refreshing to see the majority of people being supportive. I think the vast majority of people are being very positive and supportive.

 

[RowlattsFox]

A high percentage of football fans will either be actively supportive or just completely forget and it won't even cross their minds should if he become a bigger name in the game. Only people that will consistently bring it up will be the media.

 

However there will be a loud minority, especially on social media where cultures from all over the world mix, and these will be noticed more. 

 

Coming out at 17 is brave, regardless of the football aspect, he is obviously someone who is very comfortable with who he is and has greats support around him 

[Miquel The Work Geordie]

1 minute ago, RowlattsFox said:

Only people that will consistently bring it up will be the media.

 

I agree with the jist of your post mate but this just isn't true. 

[STEVIE B]

1 hour ago, don_danbury said:

i dont get why he even has to come out? why does the public need to know if he's gay or not?  

Totally agree.

I always thought it was odd that Tom Daly (the Olympian) held a bells & whistles press conference to announce that he was gay a few years back. 

Not really needed at all, only Neanderthals would make an issue out of anyone's sexuality. 

[Corky]

Neanderthals can still make life difficult for people.

[Miquel The Work Geordie]

17 minutes ago, STEVIE B said:

Totally agree.

I always thought it was odd that Tom Daly (the Olympian) held a bells & whistles press conference to announce that he was gay a few years back. 

Not really needed at all, only Neanderthals would make an issue out of anyone's sexuality. 

 

Yeah I can't imagine a generation of people who've been made to feel belittled, different and outright shit because of how they are would find any solace or power in someone making a very brave move either mate, fair play it is only the lads in O'Neills before the game after all

[Craig]

Brilliant interview, especially given his age. Obviously a massive weight off of his shoulders that'll help him, but it'll also help so many more even just knowing that he has done it.

 

 

 

 

[Sampson]

39 minutes ago, STEVIE B said:

Totally agree.

I always thought it was odd that Tom Daly (the Olympian) held a bells & whistles press conference to announce that he was gay a few years back. 

Not really needed at all, only Neanderthals would make an issue out of anyone's sexuality. 

A “Bells & whistles press conference” is what we call a YouTube video uploaded on a persons personal channel nowadays? Fecking hell, that’s a pretty thinly-veiled attempt at inventing a straw man to belittle something which didn’t happen. And out of a pretty simple 5 minute YouTube video of all things. 

 

Your post has some really nasty undertones to it, completely talking down and belittling very serious mental health issues including far higher suicide rates which many people still go through 

Edited 16 May 2022 by Sampson

[Footballwipe]

6 minutes ago, Sampson said:

A “Bells & whistles press conference” is what we call a YouTube video uploaded on a persons personal channel nowadays? Fecking hell, that’s a pretty thinly-veiled attempt at inventing a straw man to belittle something which didn’t happen. And out of a pretty simple 5 minute YouTube video of all things. 

 

Your post has some really nasty undertones to it, completely talking down and belittling very serious mental health issues including far higher suicide rates which many people still go through 

I can literally picture the two precious people in this thread, clicking away from their online campaign for straight pride to come and tell us their thoughts about this news.

[Alf Bentley]

In his Sky interview, he came across as astonishingly mature and self-assured for a 17-year-old.

 

I really hope that it works out well for him. Important that it does, for others inside and outside the game as well as for him. Although early days, it's encouraging that he says he's had such a positive response at his club.

 

I'm sure the vast majority of players, coaching staff and even fans will either be supportive or will simply shrug their shoulders.

I just hope that when he encounters the odd idiot/bigot, either he has the resilience not to be bothered by it (his interview suggests this) or that others within football step up to offer any support he needs - be that teammates, football authorities, fans or whoever. A brave young man...

 

[STEVIE B]

1 hour ago, Sampson said:

A “Bells & whistles press conference” is what we call a YouTube video uploaded on a persons personal channel nowadays? Fecking hell, that’s a pretty thinly-veiled attempt at inventing a straw man to belittle something which didn’t happen. And out of a pretty simple 5 minute YouTube video of all things. 

 

Your post has some really nasty undertones to it, completely talking down and belittling very serious mental health issues including far higher suicide rates which many people still go through 

Nothing like getting the wrong end of the stick, congratulations. 
Wind your neck in. 

[Sampson]

30 minutes ago, STEVIE B said:

Nothing like getting the wrong end of the stick, congratulations. 
Wind your neck in. 

I don’t have the energy for the debate but you literally either massively over exaggerated or completely invented a straw man scenario about a mundane YouTube video being a “press conference” with “all the bells and whistles” (which everyone understands infers attention seeking) coming out while agreeing with a “why do we need to know his sexuality? *laughing emoji*” post. 
 

Absolutely everyone can see your post for what it is mate. We’ve all seen that line of reasoning many many times before in these type of threads and the mindset it comes from.

Edited 16 May 2022 by Sampson

[don_danbury]

7 hours ago, Samilktray said:

This is such a thick post 

give me 10 good reasons why. 

[Leicesterpool]

Give the guy credit it's a brave decision to come out even more so as footballer sadly though he probably knows he will fall victim to a lot of homophobic comments and chants from opposition fans. Just got hope times will change. 

[Unabomber]

1 hour ago, Leicesterpool said:

Give the guy credit it's a brave decision to come out even more so as footballer sadly though he probably knows he will fall victim to a lot of homophobic comments and chants from opposition fans. Just got hope times will change. 

I don’t think that he will. I think now if anyone tried to start any chants aimed at him other fans would sort them out. I hope so anyway. 

[SecretPro]

1 hour ago, Unabomber said:

I don’t think that he will. I think now if anyone tried to start any chants aimed at him other fans would sort them out. I hope so anyway. 

I like to think anybody knocking out homophobic or racist abuse at a game will get a sharp dig from somebody, but it does still seem to occur now and again, unchecked, sadly.

[Finnegan]

Given how many statistically must be playing regularly in the top four leagues in this country, it'd be great to see a bit of a chain reaction and a few more come out to back him up. 

 

[CosbehFox]

3 hours ago, Unabomber said:

I don’t think that he will. I think now if anyone tried to start any chants aimed at him other fans would sort them out. I hope so anyway. 

It's also a criminal offence now - CPS defined it at the start of the year as a hate crime. You risk a conviction and long term banning order for targeted abuse. 

[Xen]

7 hours ago, don_danbury said:

give me 10 good reasons why. 

Trust me, as a gay man myself, this makes a MASSIVE difference.

 

Should it be newsworthy? Eventually, no, of course not. But until yesterday there was zero public LGBTQ representation in mens professional football in the UK for over 30 years - longer than many football fan's lifetimes. That representation is important - it might not feel like it if you've always been part of a privileged part of society as a (presumably) straight man, but seeing other gay footballers living openly and freely is such a big boost to the LGBTQ community and breaks down barriers that you might not even be aware of existing.

Its of particular relevance in the LGBTQ community where 'found family' is often just as important - if not more so - than blood, and seeing others like yourself coming out and having an overwhelming wave of support - thankfully drowning out a vocal negative minority - can make it so much easier to understand and handle the situations you're going through yourself.

 

I'd like to think over the next year or so we might see 3-4 other footballers follow suit and come out, if they're ready, and by that point it won't be a big newsworthy event anymore and just part of the game (thought still with its own ongoing battles, in a similar vein to the Kick it Out anti-racism campaign).

 

 

Perhaps you might like to come down to one of the FoxesPride socials some time and speak to a few people there about what it can mean for the community - I'm sure they'd be more than happy to welcome you and talk about this, and they'll probably articulate it a lot better than I ever could. I know Rishi and Graeme in particular have both done bits for local and national news as part of their roles with FvH/FoxesPride.

[Sampson]

7 hours ago, don_danbury said:

give me 10 good reasons why. 

1. The suicide rates among gay and bisexual men are still several times higher than those of hetrosexual men due to the many, many people who either feel like or have experienced their friends, family and loved ones changing their attitude towards them or even disowning them when they find out
2. Hundreds of thousands of people are still brought up as young, impressionable kids around parents making gay jokes and kids in the playground making gay jokes, so they feel the pressure growing up that what they are is wrong and those close to them will abandon them if they find out. A continued presence in the media and amongst high profile people who are just normal people is what changed these attitudes and also gives these young kids something to show them they are not alone and there are people out there who will accept them.
3. People absolutely *do* publicly come out as hetrosexual - by holding hands with their spouse in public, by being seen out at romantic dinners, by talking about their wife or girlfriend in public etc.
4. Heterosexuality and hetrosexual people slap us round the face with it's prevalence in society every day, homosexuality doesn't in the same way. It's improving, but there's still nowhere near the visibility of it in public.
5. Stuff like gay conversion therapy is still legal in parts of the UK and there are still hundreds of thousands of people in this country who believe in it and will force both adults or even young kids under the age of 18 to go through with it
6. We've seen only in the last week Idrissa Gueye allegedly refuse to play a game for PSG because of the rainbow campaign, that alone should tell you the attitudes in football are still a long way from fully accepting.
7. Even many people whose family and friends accept them, still have a hard time talking about it and making normal conversation about who they are dating or their partner, like a hetrosexual person would without any thought, exactly because they grew up with the pressure around it in school, which has given them a stigma at an impressionable age it's hard to shake.
8. The fact not 1 professional footballer in 30 years has been comfortable enough to be seen in public dating another man, regardless of whether they've come out openly or not, should tell you how much other players are still scared of how fans will treat them. It's still going to be a long time until we get to the point where every footballer feels comfortable just going about their lives in public, holding hands or going out for a romantic dinner with their male partner without fear of media or social media backlash or rampant speculation, exactly as hetrosexual players have the freedom to do without even thinking about it.
9. FIFA have just given the WC to a country where it's illegal to be gay or bisexual and even get the death penalty for it if they are Muslim.

10. We saw in the Euros with Hungary fans booing the LGBT flag and bring anti-LGBT banners to games that even in Europe there are still many, many nations where attitudes need to change and this only happens through visibility.

[stripeyfox]

1 hour ago, Xen said:

Trust me, as a gay man myself, this makes a MASSIVE difference.

 

Should it be newsworthy? Eventually, no, of course not. But until yesterday there was zero public LGBTQ representation in mens professional football in the UK for over 30 years - longer than many football fan's lifetimes. That representation is important - it might not feel like it if you've always been part of a privileged part of society as a (presumably) straight man, but seeing other gay footballers living openly and freely is such a big boost to the LGBTQ community and breaks down barriers that you might not even be aware of existing.

Its of particular relevance in the LGBTQ community where 'found family' is often just as important - if not more so - than blood, and seeing others like yourself coming out and having an overwhelming wave of support - thankfully drowning out a vocal negative minority - can make it so much easier to understand and handle the situations you're going through yourself.

 

I'd like to think over the next year or so we might see 3-4 other footballers follow suit and come out, if they're ready, and by that point it won't be a big newsworthy event anymore and just part of the game (thought still with its own ongoing battles, in a similar vein to the Kick it Out anti-racism campaign).

 

 

Perhaps you might like to come down to one of the FoxesPride socials some time and speak to a few people there about what it can mean for the community - I'm sure they'd be more than happy to welcome you and talk about this, and they'll probably articulate it a lot better than I ever could. I know Rishi and Graeme in particular have both done bits for local and national news as part of their roles with FvH/FoxesPride.

brilliantly articulated.

 

Mostly brilliant responses on here, which seems to be mirrored elsewhere on other threads I've seen. I thought it was lovely that he said that one of the responses from his team mates was "why didn't you tell us sooner?"

 

I can remember going to watch Villa v Wimbledon back in the early 90's and the entire Holte End was chanting homophobic songs to John Fashanu about his brother. This wasn't just a few knuckleheads either - it was the entire Holte End. I'd like to think we're a way past they kind of thing but we still have some way to go. It is the online trolling where the worst of the stuff will manifest itself. 

[leicsmac]

I'll be totally honest... if this had been a thread on here ten years ago, I would expect it to have gone very differently.

 

There's still a long way to go on acceptance of LBGT folks in football and in wider society, but it's good to see the progress made in the last few years. 

[Tanya]

20 hours ago, don_danbury said:

i dont get why he even has to come out? why does the public need to know if he's gay or not?  

I'm bi so it's different but if you're in the public eye you sort of have no choice? They'll be newspaper speculation, and  fear a fan or team mate will out you. 

 

It's also just exhausting being in the closet. It takes an enormous toll, mentally and that can even manifest in a physical manner.

 

If you're straight and don't care about someone's sexuality cause youre not a bigot I can understand your attitude,  truly I can. But I'm sure this lad wants to get this huge weight off his shoulders at the start of his career and hopefully just move on, with his sexuality just one part of his life's story. 

[Tanya]

4 hours ago, Xen said:

Trust me, as a gay man myself, this makes a MASSIVE difference.

 

Should it be newsworthy? Eventually, no, of course not. But until yesterday there was zero public LGBTQ representation in mens professional football in the UK for over 30 years - longer than many football fan's lifetimes. That representation is important - it might not feel like it if you've always been part of a privileged part of society as a (presumably) straight man, but seeing other gay footballers living openly and freely is such a big boost to the LGBTQ community and breaks down barriers that you might not even be aware of existing.

Its of particular relevance in the LGBTQ community where 'found family' is often just as important - if not more so - than blood, and seeing others like yourself coming out and having an overwhelming wave of support - thankfully drowning out a vocal negative minority - can make it so much easier to understand and handle the situations you're going through yourself.

 

I'd like to think over the next year or so we might see 3-4 other footballers follow suit and come out, if they're ready, and by that point it won't be a big newsworthy event anymore and just part of the game (thought still with its own ongoing battles, in a similar vein to the Kick it Out anti-racism campaign).

 

 

Perhaps you might like to come down to one of the FoxesPride socials some time and speak to a few people there about what it can mean for the community - I'm sure they'd be more than happy to welcome you and talk about this, and they'll probably articulate it a lot better than I ever could. I know Rishi and Graeme in particular have both done bits for local and national news as part of their roles with FvH/FoxesPride.

I didn't see your response mate, perfectly articulated.  

[Lcfc82]

34 minutes ago, Tanya said:

I'm bi so it's different but if you're in the public eye you sort of have no choice? They'll be newspaper speculation, and  fear a fan or team mate will out you. 

 

It's also just exhausting being in the closet. It takes an enormous toll, mentally and that can even manifest in a physical manner.

 

If you're straight and don't care about someone's sexuality cause youre not a bigot I can understand your attitude,  truly I can. But I'm sure this lad wants to get this huge weight off his shoulders at the start of his career and hopefully just move on, with his sexuality just one part of his life's story. 

There shouldn’t be news speculation though, although you’re correct as there certainly would be.

 

The media are a massive part of the problem of why nobody wants to come out IMO they are desperately looking for there “ gay footballer “ which is what this lad from Blackpool is going to become. 
 

I hope he gets left alone to get on with his life and career now