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Daggers

The joke thread

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Tielemans63

Tielemans63

Posted
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Posted

I met a girl in the pub last night. We chatted and got drunk and I ended up at hers.

 

"Listen" I said, "I'm not very experienced and when I'm with a girl for the first time I do suffer from a bit of premature ejaculation."

 

"Well we can take it slow, babe," she winked. "How premature?"

 

"Remember earlier in the pub, when you asked me about sex?"

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Then."

  • Like 6
Tuna

Tuna

Posted
Posted
On ‎22‎/‎05‎/‎2017 at 20:36, Beliall said:

It puts the lotion in the basket or it gets the hose again

Put the Fooking lotion in the basket !

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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, Beliall said:

That was my "well" pun. I think outside the box

 

Way too far outside mine.

 

Care to explain?

Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
11 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

Way too far outside mine.

 

Care to explain?

Have you not seen the silence of the lambs?

 

 

Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted
6 minutes ago, Drew Peacock said:

"There is no need for you to ever buy expensive knickers."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because they will be 100% off if you come back to my place."

The tinder thread is that way Larry >>>>>>>>>

  • Like 1
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, Beliall said:

Have you not seen the silence of the lambs?

 

 

 

I have, but I don't have an eidetic memory.

 

She's in a well then?

Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 minute ago, Buce said:

 

I have, but I don't have an eidetic memory.

 

She's in a well then?

Yes. I'm shit a puns. I don't do very well with them

Edited by Beliall
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
Just now, Beliall said:

I'M NOT FUNNY OK!!  Just leave me alone 

 

 

lol

 

Let that be a lesson to you for your 'Duck Pond' thread.

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Beliall

Beliall

Posted
Posted

I walked in on my sister last night , masturbating with a carrot.

 

I shouted out "seriously ? I was gonna eat that later but now it will just taste like carrots"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Via reddit. 

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Renart

Renart

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Beliall said:

I walked in on my sister last night , masturbating with a carrot.

 

I shouted out "seriously ? I was gonna eat that later but now it will just taste like carrots"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Via reddit. 

 

On 24/05/2017 at 08:13, Beliall said:

I'M NOT FUNNY OK!!  Just leave me alone 

 

 

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Countryfox

Countryfox

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WHAT DOES A DYSLEXIC, AGNOSTIC, INSOMNIAC SPEND MOST OF HIS TIME DOING ?? ....

 

STAYING UP ALL NIGHT WONDERING IF THERE REALLY IS A DOG.

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