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Daggers

The joke thread

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Alf Bentley

Alf Bentley

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, fuchsntf said:

Aaaaaarrrrrrgghhhh bistow.

 

Is that an attempt to rewrite that great "You're shit! Aaaaaarrrrrrgghhhh!" chant that was being so unfairly lambasted the other day?

 

It could work. I can  imagine opposing keepers getting seriously distracted, if not psychologically disturbed by persistent roaring about Bisto from behind the goal.

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fuchsntf

fuchsntf

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Alf Bentley said:

 

Is that an attempt to rewrite that great "You're shit! Aaaaaarrrrrrgghhhh!" chant that was being so unfairly lambasted the other day?

 

It could work. I can  imagine opposing keepers getting seriously distracted, if not psychologically disturbed by persistent roaring about Bisto from behind the goal.

Aaaaaarrrrfggghhhh  Bistow was decades before, the you're shit! version

Gravy  needs Pies...Chuck some Puka  at or over to the hard done by goalies.Especially on Cold Authmn-Winter nights...

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Izzy

Izzy

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A strange woman looked through my window this morning and saw me watching porn and masturbating furiously.

 

Thankfully after about ten seconds of shocked embarrassing silence, the lights turned green.

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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, Izzy said:

A strange woman looked through my window this morning and saw me watching porn and masturbating furiously.

 

Thankfully after about ten seconds of shocked embarrassing silence, the lights turned green.

 

I used to drive trucks back in the dim and distant, and I used to see this all the time; sitting in a queue of traffic you'd see drivers merrily beating away, completely oblivious that you can see down into a car from a truck's cab.

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SeCrEt FoX

SeCrEt FoX

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Buce said:

 

I used to drive trucks back in the dim and distant, and I used to see this all the time; sitting in a queue of traffic you'd see drivers merrily beating away, completely oblivious that you can see down into a car from a truck's cab.

🤣 I was stuck in traffic on the M5 many moons ago and we was in the middle lane. I was a passenger in a ford transit so was a bit higher than a car, I looked to my left and the guy in the car next to us was naked from the waist down beating his meat, couldn't believe my eyes. Some people! 

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Webbo

Webbo

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1 hour ago, SeCrEt FoX said:

🤣 I was stuck in traffic on the M5 many moons ago and we was in the middle lane. I was a passenger in a ford transit so was a bit higher than a car, I looked to my left and the guy in the car next to us was naked from the waist down beating his meat, couldn't believe my eyes. Some people! 

It was itchy and I needed to give it a scratch. :blush:

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Facecloth

Facecloth

Posted
Posted (edited)

I've just been to the Drs to see if they can do anything about my addiction to Sudoku.

 

First they said they had no appointments, but then they said they could fit me in between 3 and 6.

Edited by Facecloth
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Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted

 

So, I looked out the window this morning and there's the missus, eight months pregnant and bent over double pushing the lawnmower.

 

"Stop!", I shouted, "a woman in your condition shouldn't be pushing a heavy mower like that... stand-up straighter"

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Raj

Raj

Posted
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On 03/09/2021 at 07:37, Buce said:

 

I used to drive trucks back in the dim and distant, and I used to see this all the time; sitting in a queue of traffic you'd see drivers merrily beating away, completely oblivious that you can see down into a car from a truck's cab.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Parafox

Parafox

Posted
Posted
On 03/09/2021 at 07:37, Buce said:

 

I used to drive trucks back in the dim and distant, and I used to see this all the time; sitting in a queue of traffic you'd see drivers merrily beating away, completely oblivious that you can see down into a car from a truck's cab.

I used to drive HGV's on my rest days and I too have experienced the same. On rare occasions, females too. Once, on a very hot day there was a young lady in a car on my offside. We were in a slow queue and she was removing her clothing until she was naked from the waist down. She didn't fumble about but clearly had no idea what a truck driver has a view of. I struggled to keep my truck alongside as the queue's were moving at different speeds.

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Izzy

Izzy

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13 minutes ago, Parafox said:

I struggled to keep my truck alongside because I was busy spanking the monkey and couldn't change gear and steer at the same time.

:whistle:

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fuchsntf

fuchsntf

Posted
Posted
On 03/09/2021 at 13:55, SeCrEt FoX said:

🤣 I was stuck in traffic on the M5 many moons ago and we was in the middle lane. I was a passenger in a ford transit so was a bit higher than a car, I looked to my left and the guy in the car next to us was naked from the waist down beating his meat, couldn't believe my eyes. Some people! 

Yehhh..why was you watching...

 

 

 

 

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Blarmy

Blarmy

Posted
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17 hours ago, Parafox said:

I used to drive HGV's on my rest days and I too have experienced the same. On rare occasions, females too. Once, on a very hot day there was a young lady in a car on my offside. We were in a slow queue and she was removing her clothing until she was naked from the waist down. She didn't fumble about but clearly had no idea what a truck driver has a view of. I struggled to keep my truck alongside as the queue's were moving at different speeds.

 

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