Depression

[Russell sprout]

3 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

"shut the **** up Urban"

Keep your head up mate,

I can relate to everything you’ve said and for that your not alone,

I remember Chester Bennington passing away and it hit me as if it was a family member because when you listen to his music it was almost a cry for help that we all missed,just remember that your important to your family and they love you 

[SheppyFox]

8 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

"shut the **** up Urban"

No, please don’t shut up 🙂 it’s healthy. Millions of people keep their mouth shut and that’s not a good thing. Keep talking about it. I know I probably come across as someone you wouldn’t want to talk to about these things but my understanding of it is unfortunately deep and close to home because of family. 
 

That goes for anyone, please talk. I don’t mind talking in private, I’m sure a lot of people on here won’t mind doing the same if you need to chat, send a message to me or anyone 🙂 if I’m not banned I’ll reply 😆

Edited 16 February 2020 by SheppyFox

[Crinklyfox]

13 hours ago, Bert said:

I need help

Well done for posting Bert.  It's easy to feel isolated and it becomes very hard to do anything, including reaching out.

 

There's a lot of people on this thread who have needed help themselves at some time, including me.  So don't feel bad that you're in that situation, we can relate to it.

 

Few of us are medical professionals but many of us have their individual experiences, some of which may be of help to you.  So could you please elaborate a little, describe your feelings and what you really need. 

[gw_leics772]

Deleted

Edited 16 February 2020 by gw_leics772

[HighPeakFox]

1 hour ago, gw_leics772 said:

 

 

Edited 16 February 2020 by HighPeakFox
Deleted

[gw_leics772]

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Edited 17 February 2020 by gw_leics772

[RonnieTodger]

On 15/02/2020 at 23:25, urban.spaceman said:

Serious note though, I always find myself so upset when there's a suicide in the news, particularly a public figure. I cried for 3 ****ing days when Robin Williams died; partly because I was struggling at the time but also cos I ****ing loved the guy. Chester Bennington was a tough one to take too.

 

I've previously used my depression to lash out at people whether they deserved it or not; recently though my therapist has helped me realise that I'm better if I'm kind to my core, so now I try to have as much compassion as possible for everyone (again, whether or not they deserve it, which has proved unpopular sometimes...)

 

Caroline Flack's upset me today too, particularly as I've had a couple of very close calls myself very recently. I keep thinking 'if only' she'd had the help she needed.

 

Suicide doesn't stop things getting worse, it stops things getting better. 

 

Be kind, be compassionate. It's ok to be vulnerable. And it's ok to ask for help.

The Caroline Flack death has really freaked me out and I can't explain why. Truth be told, it has triggered some dark feelings and thoughts that I've managed to banish over the last year or so.

I followed her on Instagram etc, but obviously never knew her. I always liked her as a celeb and it's just a tragic waste of life. I don't know why I'm cut up over a TV presenter, I just keep thinking about it.

 

About this time last year, I was really feeling shit. Struggling to get out of bed and go to work. Six months down the line, I managed to land a great job and things are still going well but since Christmas, I can feel myself slipping again. Since one of my colleagues took his own life last year, my work has setup a paid-for helpline and counselling service. 

 

I've had some real family issues that have improved, but I'm going to use this service now because I'm worried about the way I'm feeling when I wake up.

[urban.spaceman]

32 minutes ago, RonnieTodger said:

The Caroline Flack death has really freaked me out and I can't explain why. Truth be told, it has triggered some dark feelings and thoughts that I've managed to banish over the last year or so.

I followed her on Instagram etc, but obviously never knew her. I always liked her as a celeb and it's just a tragic waste of life. I don't know why I'm cut up over a TV presenter, I just keep thinking about it.

 

About this time last year, I was really feeling shit. Struggling to get out of bed and go to work. Six months down the line, I managed to land a great job and things are still going well but since Christmas, I can feel myself slipping again. Since one of my colleagues took his own life last year, my work has setup a paid-for helpline and counselling service. 

 

I've had some real family issues that have improved, but I'm going to use this service now because I'm worried about the way I'm feeling when I wake up.

Sorry you've been unwell Ronnie. I didn't know anything about her at all, never watched any of her shows and probably never would, but I just feel like it's a real tragedy, like any suicide is. Suicide can have a real knock-on effect, especially for people that have long standing mental health issues - Chester Bennington was so cut up by Chris Cornell's suicide that it threw him into a deep depression he never recovered from. I think something similar happened with two Love Island contestants too. I worry for anyone close to Caroline Flack or was a particular fan of hers. I really, really hope that her death inspires people to talk more and get help. 

 

You work's scheme sounds really good, I hope it helps you mate.

[RonnieTodger]

32 minutes ago, urban.spaceman said:

Sorry you've been unwell Ronnie. I didn't know anything about her at all, never watched any of her shows and probably never would, but I just feel like it's a real tragedy, like any suicide is. Suicide can have a real knock-on effect, especially for people that have long standing mental health issues - Chester Bennington was so cut up by Chris Cornell's suicide that it threw him into a deep depression he never recovered from. I think something similar happened with two Love Island contestants too. I worry for anyone close to Caroline Flack or was a particular fan of hers. I really, really hope that her death inspires people to talk more and get help. 

 

You work's scheme sounds really good, I hope it helps you mate.

Thank you mate. I was a fan of hers but couldn't really stand anything she presented. 

 

Had no idea that Cornell was a catalyst for Chester Bennington's death.

Edited 18 February 2020 by RonnieTodger

[Guest]

Anyone ever feel guilty being alive?

[Jon the Hat]

14 minutes ago, shanetko said:

Anyone ever feel guilty being alive?

Not personally, but it is a pretty well known experience I think, especially if you lose someone close to you, or in a sort of "it could have been me" situation.  Lots of forces / police etc type who lose a colleague for example.  Like any though ot self harm taking yoru own life it I guess is makes sense at the time, but isn't a rational feeling.  You have value and every right to be here and live your life, and a tragedy happening to someone else doesn't change that.

[urban.spaceman]

On 18/02/2020 at 14:04, RonnieTodger said:

Thank you mate. I was a fan of hers but couldn't really stand anything she presented. 

 

Had no idea that Cornell was a catalyst for Chester Bennington's death.

Sadly he was. They were apparently very close - Bennington was a godfather to one of Cornell's kids. He also performed at his funeral. And sadly, Bennington killed himself on what would have been Cornell's birthday.

 

Hope you're doing better mate.

[urban.spaceman]

Feeling much better and more positive at the minute. Got my car and freedom back, so that could be it. Still waiting to hear about a job opportunity but feeling like no news is good news. Also, went and booked my first tattoo today! Really excited about how it will come out. Decided to get one the other week when I was in a low point and needed positive plans to look forward to. Something that reminds me who I am. Can’t ****ing wait. 
 

hope everyone is doing ok. If not, you’re not alone. X

[HybridFox]

Turned down 2 big opportunities a few years ago to stay and help a company where I was only a temp who were seriously short staffed.

 

Today I found out from a colleague that I am soon to be sacked. Done everything I've been asked, worked my socks off and to find out behind your back.

 

Loyalty gets you nowhere eh 

[Izzy]

2 minutes ago, TK95 said:

Turned down 2 big opportunities a few years ago to stay and help a company where I was only a temp who were seriously short staffed.

 

Today I found out from a colleague that I am soon to be sacked. Done everything I've been asked, worked my socks off and to find out behind your back.

 

Loyalty gets you nowhere eh 

Sorry to hear this mate. Do you mean sacked or has your role been made redundant?

 

If sacked then you must have done something wrong or not performed to the levels expected? And why have you heard this from a colleague and not your line manager?

 

I do agree that loyalty is vastly over rated. We're all just a payroll number at the end of the day sadly...

[gw_leics772]

Anyone have any experience with gabopentin nerve blockers for pain relief but also old style anti depressants.

They are reacting really well with my paroxetine (anti depressants) as well as me being nearly pain free for the first time in about 8 months.

 

 I am concerned about when i have to come off them re anticipated  mood drop.

 

But until then i am lovong the life and enjoying feeling genuinely upbeat and more importantly pain free.

.

[PAULCFC]

10 minutes ago, gw_leics772 said:

Anyone have any experience with gabopentin nerve blockers for pain relief but also old style anti depressants.

They are reacting really well with my paroxetine (anti depressants) as well as me being nearly pain free for the first time in about 8 months.

 

 I am concerned about when i have to come off them re anticipated  mood drop.

 

But until then i am lovong the life and enjoying feeling genuinely upbeat and more importantly pain free.

.

No experiance with them,but i'm still on Sertoline and you were one of the people on this forum that gave me help...so i really hope it works!

[gw_leics772]

2 hours ago, PAULCFC said:

No experiance with them,but i'm still on Sertoline and you were one of the people on this forum that gave me help...so i really hope it works!

It's ace mate, im living the dream with the pills and trying to just enjoy it but the condition means i cant help worrying about the next problem that i know is on the horizon. Glad i could help.

[urban.spaceman]

On 29/02/2020 at 11:53, urban.spaceman said:

Feeling much better and more positive at the minute. Got my car and freedom back, so that could be it. Still waiting to hear about a job opportunity but feeling like no news is good news. Also, went and booked my first tattoo today! Really excited about how it will come out. Decided to get one the other week when I was in a low point and needed positive plans to look forward to. Something that reminds me who I am. Can’t ****ing wait. 
 

hope everyone is doing ok. If not, you’re not alone. X

I'm doing much better right now, without the usual depression about a birthday coming up (I'm accepting the whole ageing thing). There's still the odd anxiety and a couple of low extremes but I'm doing much better than I have been doing for weeks. 

 

I got my first tattoo today! I absolutely love it. I've mentioned on here about extremes in anxiety when deciding to do something but I'm really comfortable and happy with the one I've got. It's Africa inspire, something that means a lot to me and looks ****ing beautiful. I might post pictures when it's healed. I'm already thinking of how to add to it; definitely something to do with Leicester City and Monty Python. And before you know it I'm getting carried away and adding all sorts of shit to it.

 

But I'm really pleased with what I've got and really proud of myself of how far I've come from the very low I had a few weeks ago. 

 

Which is the point of this thread. I really hope everyone here is doing OK. This thread can be a lifesaver at times. Never be afraid to speak out or ask for help, because there's some amazing people here who have been and are going through it who can help.

[joachim1965]

A great song by a great band that belongs in this thread.

Hope the words help some folk on here.

[joachim1965]

Live version with some background information.

[UniFox21]

Not sure what hit me today, but had one of those days where the world felt too much for me. Found myself trying to leave the office/lab frequently to just sit in an empty room to psych myself up to carry on with the day.

Wasn't a hard day at work, but I bloody struggled today 

[PAULCFC]

Never listened to that band before,,,,,but i may have the word's all wrong....i'm not going bed.......was me a couple of months ago!

[Rusko187]

Not that I'm in a bad place or anything at the moment, but I'm living in a bit of fear that I may regress into more anxiety and depression.

 

For years, I've suffered with video game addiction (which honestly most people would think is quite a silly thing), but genuinely the amount of money, time, energy, output that I have wasted through video games... I honestly dread to think. I've since just took a good look and myself and thought "what am I getting out of this?", most of the games I play just anger me if I fail and I've since managed to really push away from them.

I've since replaced this huge void in my life with work, family and going to the gym, and I've really started to see an upturn in my emotions, performance at work and myself as a whole. I still get anxious about stupid things, but it's not anywhere near as bad, and the gym has helped to grow confidence and belief in my ability..... so why am I in fear of regressing? Well I guess with what feels like a collapsing society, the one thing that has propped me up for these past few months, I feel is only going to be a matter of time before heavy restrictions or even closures mean that I won't be able to go to the gym.

And what will be around to welcome me back? Video games.

 

So a question to you all, anyone else struggling in this really weird period?

[Lionator]

33 minutes ago, UniFox21 said:

Not sure what hit me today, but had one of those days where the world felt too much for me. Found myself trying to leave the office/lab frequently to just sit in an empty room to psych myself up to carry on with the day.

Wasn't a hard day at work, but I bloody struggled today 

I know it's not really a fix but it's ok to have days like that, they happen to us all. You've got through it though, and that shows an inner strength.