CKB Posted 30 April 2011 Share Posted 30 April 2011 Feck me! it's like she's been hit by a somekinda g-force producing machine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Year Of The Fox Posted 30 April 2011 Author Share Posted 30 April 2011 Thats how she'd look riding me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maybes Posted 30 April 2011 Share Posted 30 April 2011 Thats how she'd look riding me Bored? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parafox Posted 30 April 2011 Share Posted 30 April 2011 Tsk Tsk... all these unsavoury comments about our future Queen... Commoners the lot of you I'd bang it though. Wonder what she'll look like at 80 yrs old? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davieG Posted 3 May 2011 Share Posted 3 May 2011 Pippa Middleton's arse takes important step towards 'bootyfication' Pippa Middleton's tight arse took a major step towards bootyfication last night as news emerged of a miraculous cure for erectile dysfunction in a 53 year-old man from Stoke on Trent. The alleged miracle took place at a semi-detached house in the Longton area of the town while 24 million people watched a BBC camera crew homing in on Middleton's pert fundament during the hymn Bread of Heaven. Frank Wilson, the delighted recipient of the cure, first noticed a stirring down below when Pippa's shapely curves came into view as she entered the church, flanked by a fully-tumescent Prince Harry. Wilson asserts that he has been functionally impotent since a broadband wank marathon in the autumn of 2004 went awry. But the claims are disputed by his wife Erica who maintains that Wilson achieved a 'semi' during the third round Wimbledon clash between Maria Sharapova and Kim Clijsters in 2008. Mrs Wilson says her husband's half-interested member swayed "cobra-like" as Ms Sharapova ordered extra water during a time-out. Pippa Middleton's arse bootified If the claims can be verified, Middleton's buttocks will be officially recognised as "blessed", a status hitherto achieved only by Beyonce after her legendary butt-tremble was declared as 'nothing shot of miraculous' by three men watching MTV in a bar in Yeovil. Scholars have also suggested that Middleton's fullsome rump may have retrospectively helped speed the fall of communism in Eastern Europe by reclaiming the impulse of hope which had faltered before Marxism and the pernicious ideology that everyone should have a fair crack of the whip and get paid a living wage for the work they do. Experts have insisted that for Middleton's arse to achieve full sainthood would require a second miracle. Yet last night a further miracle appeared to be at hand after none other than Prince Edward was alleged to have ogled her rear from two rows back. Witnesses claim The Earl of Wessex curled one forearm under the other and, with a clenched fist, shouted "Cor blimey – you could park a bike in that!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Webbo Posted 3 May 2011 Share Posted 3 May 2011 I must say, The Daily Telegraph has dumbed down recently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steven Posted 3 May 2011 Share Posted 3 May 2011 ..... broadband wank marathon in the autumn of 2004 ..... What caused that marathon? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DANGEROUS TIGER Posted 4 May 2011 Share Posted 4 May 2011 Had a bad dream last night. Kate Middleton said, "NO" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21st Century Fox Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Up the duff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I am Rod Hull Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Wonderful news. Must pop down the shop for a couple of beers to celebrate the continuity of our glorious monarchy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Webbo Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corky Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Well played Wills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parafox Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Who really gives a flying fvck? And she's been admitted to hospital with... morning sickness. Dear God... like it's some kind of life threatening condition... no-ones EVER had morning sickness before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21st Century Fox Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Who really gives a flying fvck? You're right they could have conceived on a plane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parafox Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 You're right they could have conceived on a plane. Wonder if they'll name the sprog after the place it was concieved in, a la the Beckhams? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vacamion Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Nick Witchell's missus has just gone out on spending spree, to use up all that lovely overtime cash he'll bring in over the next few days especially and the next year generally.... '...well, Huw, I'm still outside the hospital where you left me 20 minutes ago. She's still up the duff, there have been no developments. Let's just spend 5 minutes idly speculating about how she is feeling, maybe interviewing some old lady who thinks the whole thing is luvverly...kill me. Kill me now. This is Nicholas Witchell, BBC News, London' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StanSP Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Imagine if the baby's ginger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trav Le Bleu Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Who really gives a flying fvck? And she's been admitted to hospital with... morning sickness. Dear God... like it's some kind of life threatening condition... no-ones EVER had morning sickness before. I thought this. Hopefully she's on some NHS ward in St Thomas' - which is their nearest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryn Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Who really gives a flying fvck? And she's been admitted to hospital with... morning sickness. Dear God... like it's some kind of life threatening condition... no-ones EVER had morning sickness before. Hyperemesis gravidarum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MPH Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Who really gives a flying fvck? And she's been admitted to hospital with... morning sickness. Dear God... like it's some kind of life threatening condition... no-ones EVER had morning sickness before. Hyperemesis gravidarum. An entirely appropriate admittance to hospital especially considering she has already lost a baby.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEFATBASTARD Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Anybody know the odds on this baby being black? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MC Prussian Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 It's going to be both pretty and pretty bald and run around naked for the rest of his (or her) life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tielemans63 Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Imagine if the baby's ginger. Unlike at Harry's conception, James Hewitt's not been involved this time round so it's unlikely. * EDIT although don't discount the seductive powers of Nick Witchell - he's in with the Royals, maybe literally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21st Century Fox Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 Anybody know the odds on this baby being black? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marko Posted 3 December 2012 Share Posted 3 December 2012 From Frankie Boyle: The only reason Kate Middleton's pregnant is she doesn't have tits worth finishing on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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