Depression

[spacemunky]

17 minutes ago, totbl said:

For those on anti anxiety/depressants, interested in how much these have effected (negatively or otherwise) your sex life?

 

A bit embarrassing to post this - but the last month or so I just couldn't care less about sex. I don't feel depressed, and in many ways I'm more mentally healthy than I've been in years. When I was at my most anxious, I was probably borderline addicted to sex/porn etc., but now my drive is so low, I don't feel like myself. I exercise, try and take care of myself etc. but I'm just happy going to work, doing whatever and going to sleep. I know this isn't the most important issue by any means on this thread - but just curious because I feel a bit like I've lost part of me (not physically!) cheers. Maybe it's a phase and will kick in again who knows.

Before I started on anti-depressants over a year ago, someone already on them mentioned that this would be an issue. He was not wrong. 

 

I went to see my doc after a few months on the pills and I told him I had trouble ejaculating and that it really took a lot of work to do so. He said "Look at it this way, you're now the world's greatest lover" 

 

It's for sure had an effect on how much a part of my day is about sex. Even if I try to crank one out before sleep, I almost always fall asleep first. 

 

One thing about the pills I'm on is that they seem to make me feel content with everything. Maybe that's why I'm not viewing it as a big deal.

[Buce]

33 minutes ago, totbl said:

For those on anti anxiety/depressants, interested in how much these have effected (negatively or otherwise) your sex life?

 

A bit embarrassing to post this - but the last month or so I just couldn't care less about sex. I don't feel depressed, and in many ways I'm more mentally healthy than I've been in years. When I was at my most anxious, I was probably borderline addicted to sex/porn etc., but now my drive is so low, I don't feel like myself. I exercise, try and take care of myself etc. but I'm just happy going to work, doing whatever and going to sleep. I know this isn't the most important issue by any means on this thread - but just curious because I feel a bit like I've lost part of me (not physically!) cheers. Maybe it's a phase and will kick in again who knows.

 

7 minutes ago, spacemunky said:

Before I started on anti-depressants over a year ago, someone already on them mentioned that this would be an issue. He was not wrong. 

 

I went to see my doc after a few months on the pills and I told him I had trouble ejaculating and that it really took a lot of work to do so. He said "Look at it this way, you're now the world's greatest lover" 

 

It's for sure had an effect on how much a part of my day is about sex. Even if I try to crank one out before sleep, I almost always fall asleep first. 

 

One thing about the pills I'm on is that they seem to make me feel content with everything. Maybe that's why I'm not viewing it as a big deal.

@totbl Are you on tablets atm? Sorry, it's not clear.

 

@spacemunky You could try asking your GP to switch you to mirtazepine - iirc sexual dysfunction is not listed as a side effect.

[totbl]

19 minutes ago, spacemunky said:

Before I started on anti-depressants over a year ago, someone already on them mentioned that this would be an issue. He was not wrong. 

 

I went to see my doc after a few months on the pills and I told him I had trouble ejaculating and that it really took a lot of work to do so. He said "Look at it this way, you're now the world's greatest lover" 

 

It's for sure had an effect on how much a part of my day is about sex. Even if I try to crank one out before sleep, I almost always fall asleep first. 

 

One thing about the pills I'm on is that they seem to make me feel content with everything. Maybe that's why I'm not viewing it as a big deal.

I can definitely agree with the being content thing - which is great, but trying to figure out in my head if that is worth risking for the other thing. Might have a word with the doc and see what they say. Cheers for the reply

[totbl]

9 minutes ago, Buce said:

 

@totbl Are you on tablets atm? Sorry, it's not clear.

 

@spacemunky You could try asking your GP to switch you to mirtazepine - iirc sexual dysfunction is not listed as a side effect.

I am mate - Sertaline. Since December, although it wasn't immediate. The longer I'm on them the more effective they seem to be, but also the more this issue has come up. It could be completely unlinked, but I can't see it

[Buce]

36 minutes ago, totbl said:

I am mate - Sertaline. Since December, although it wasn't immediate. The longer I'm on them the more effective they seem to be, but also the more this issue has come up. It could be completely unlinked, but I can't see it

 

I would think it's almost certainly the case then - sexual dysfunction is associated with SSRIs.

 

https://www.everydayhealth.com/drugs/zoloft

 

Zoloft (Sertraline) can cause more serious side effects in some patients. These may include:

• Decreased interest in sex
• Decrease in sexual ability
• Muscle cramps/weakness
• Bruising or bleeding easily
• Shaking/tremor
• Unusual weight loss

See your GP and mention Mirtazapine as an alternative.

Edited 15 August 2019 by Buce

[Lester.14]

Firstly, ive said it before, and ill no doubt say it again but honestly, reaching out to you guys has given me an uplift, theres an awfully long way to go, however just being able to talk is encouraging, Thank you!

 

just wondering what advice you can offer me on the following:

 

as you may of read im currently without work, however im due to start with a new agency at GI Group with barker ross on Monday night. im currently taking Citalopram and Diazepam, on the various forms i will inevitably have to fill out, do you suggest i be open and tell them, or not?

 

After reading someone suggest AbleFutures, i have contacted them but am unable to see someone locally until mid September.

 

any advice would be highly appreciated

Edited 16 August 2019 by Lester.14

[Buce]

1 minute ago, Lester.14 said:

Firstly, ive said it before, and ill no doubt say it again but honestly, reaching out to you guys has given me an uplift, theres an awfully long way to go, however just being able to talk is encouraging, Thank you!

 

just wondering what advice you can offer me on the following:

 

as you may of read im currently without work, however im due to start with a new agency at GI Group with barker ross on Monday night. im currently taking Citalopram and Diazepam, on the various forms i will inevitably have to fill out, do you suggest i be open and tell them, or not?

 

After reading someone suggest AbleFutures, i have contacted them but am unable to see someone locally until mid September.

 

any advice would be highly apprecia

 

Personally, I wouldn't.

 

I just think that there is still a lot of mental health prejudice out there, but then I'm a cynical git.

[Lester.14]

1 minute ago, Buce said:

 

Personally, I wouldn't.

 

I just think that there is still a lot of mental health prejudice out there, but then I'm a cynical git.

i agree. theres more to lose by telling them.

[Costock_Fox]

Re the earlier posts re sex/ lack of when taking anti depressants, I have a friend who was on them for a while and we were sitting having a beer while watching Liverpool last week.

 

We start talking about when we have rang in sick and he tells me of two occasions, one of which was where he took viagra because he hadn’t felt the urge for a long time. I nearly spat my drink out when he said it gave him a stonking h... eadache. I guess you had to be there.

[Costock_Fox]

20 minutes ago, Lester.14 said:

Firstly, ive said it before, and ill no doubt say it again but honestly, reaching out to you guys has given me an uplift, theres an awfully long way to go, however just being able to talk is encouraging, Thank you!

 

just wondering what advice you can offer me on the following:

 

as you may of read im currently without work, however im due to start with a new agency at GI Group with barker ross on Monday night. im currently taking Citalopram and Diazepam, on the various forms i will inevitably have to fill out, do you suggest i be open and tell them, or not?

 

After reading someone suggest AbleFutures, i have contacted them but am unable to see someone locally until mid September.

 

any advice would be highly appreciated

Don’t tell them unless your job actually prohibits being on them, I don’t think you have much to gain by telling them about it to be honest and especially if it’s an agency because they will probably only give a shit if you turn up so they get paid.

[Wymsey]

Can imagine there's a lot of people who don't feel comfortable in stating in how they feel to the others, especially if they're struggling, to this day still.

 

It's sad that some feel this way; as revealing how they feel to someone else, when appropriate, and the recipient understanding / emphasizing with them - would do the former a world of good in terms of having the courage to speak out.

Edited 16 August 2019 by Wymeswold fox

[TaggertvsWise]

On 14/08/2019 at 15:27, urban.spaceman said:

It feels like baby steps sometimes mate, which thanks to many brilliant people on here, doesn't feel like a bad thing!

 

Hope your therapy went OK bud.

I think baby steps are largely all we can realistically manage to ensure that progress is sustainable and we don’t get amazing highs followed by awful lows.

 

CBT was really good. I have 3 more sessions, 2 hours each one over the next 3 weeks and then I’ll go from there. Learning about the concept of flight or fight and applying it to anxiety was very revealing to me. I will share stuff once I get more of a handle on it.

 

Keep going everyone. @HowardsBulletHeader Well done for chatting, your comments about anonymity on here mirror mine. That this is such a remarkable forum that allows us to talk to strangers without fear of judgement (and amongst fellow foxes fans!!) has been such a release for me to be able to cope.

 

My CBT and Able Futures work is really helping me understand what my triggers are and how to not treat myself like utter shit. As ever if anyone ever wants to DM please do.

[UniFox21]

10 hours ago, Wymeswold fox said:

Can imagine there's a lot of people who don't feel comfortable in stating in how they feel to the others, especially if they're struggling, to this day still.

 

It's sad that some feel this way; as revealing how they feel to someone else, when appropriate, and the recipient understanding / emphasizing with them - would do the former a world of good in terms of having the courage to speak out.

I've just always found it easier to bottle up if I'm breaking down so to speak. It just mostly worked for me of bottling and diving into work or something to keep myself busy. Inevitably it gets to a point where i crack a little and speak the surface of the issues, which relieves the stress a bit and then just go back to carrying on.

 

 

Edited 16 August 2019 by UniFox21

[urban.spaceman]

Why is it that some people just have this ability to make you feel like utter shite? I mean literally feel this ****ing small.

 

Fed up.

[HighPeakFox]

3 minutes ago, urban.spaceman said:

Why is it that some people just have this ability to make you feel like utter shite? I mean literally feel this ****ing small.

 

Fed up.

I know. And you'll hate me for saying this, but we have a choice in how some lowlife affects us or otherwise. Try to imagine that everything that they say to you is actually them self-appraising, it takes on a different meaning.

[Costock_Fox]

I’m not really having the best of times at the minute.

[HighPeakFox]

2 hours ago, Costock_Fox said:

I’m not really having the best of times at the minute.

Please share.

[Crinklyfox]

9 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Why is it that some people just have this ability to make you feel like utter shite? I mean literally feel this ****ing small.

 

Fed up.

I've found that only the people that I love or respect can really hurt me.  If some idiot starts to badmouth me I couldn't care less because I know he's an idiot, I don't have any respect for his views.  If my children badmouth me I'm crushed because I'm emotionally attached to them and how they feel is my concern.

 

Some arrogant people think it their right to have a go at others in public; when that happens it's usually the arrogant person mouthing off that looks bad to others, not the person being bad-mouthed.

[Finnegan]

On 15/08/2019 at 22:29, spacemunky said:

Before I started on anti-depressants over a year ago, someone already on them mentioned that this would be an issue. He was not wrong. 

 

I went to see my doc after a few months on the pills and I told him I had trouble ejaculating and that it really took a lot of work to do so. He said "Look at it this way, you're now the world's greatest lover" 

 

It's for sure had an effect on how much a part of my day is about sex. Even if I try to crank one out before sleep, I almost always fall asleep first. 

 

One thing about the pills I'm on is that they seem to make me feel content with everything. Maybe that's why I'm not viewing it as a big deal.

 

 

Was quite possibly me. Disappointing response from your GP, its actually quite a big deal. It was occasionally frustrating when masturbating but then you can shrug and just give up.

 

When you're having sex and you're already vulnerable to anxiety, hence being on them in the first place, you start fixating on it, worrying about it, panicking that your girlfriend will think it's her fault, feeling embarrassed, snowballs from there and just becomes stressful. 

 

Not fun. 

 

You go and tell your GP that physical side effects are a problem, he shouldn't be making jokes he should be trying out alternatives tbf. 

 

I had side effects with citalopram that I didn't with fluoxetine but that others did and visa versa. The reason so many similar drugs exist is everyone reacts a bit differently. 

 

There's probably a combination out there that'd work better. 

[Costock_Fox]

7 hours ago, HighPeakFox said:

Please share.

Just similar to what I’ve posted before to be honest.

[Lionator]

19 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Why is it that some people just have this ability to make you feel like utter shite? I mean literally feel this ****ing small.

 

Fed up.

There are arseholes literally everywhere. We can't control their behaviour however it's always important to remember you can control how you react to their behaviour. It's not their behaviour that makes you feel small, it's the way that you react to their behaviour which makes you feel small (that's not victim blaming by the way). If you think of them as a rude and not worth your time then you literally just have to block it out and look beyond it or else it'll just get you down and ultimately be a waste of your time. @Crinklyfox is right, they're not worth it.

 

14 hours ago, Costock_Fox said:

I’m not really having the best of times at the minute.

Keep at it! 'At the minute' shows that it's temporary, that's it's just in the present moment! It'll soon pick up for you I'm sure. 

[Buce]

19 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Why is it that some people just have this ability to make you feel like utter shite? I mean literally feel this ****ing small.

 

Fed up.

 

Because you give it to them, mate.

 

Without your consent they are powerless.

[PAULCFC]

Went to see the doc.yesterday and he and me are happy to keep me taking the meds at the same dosage.He said it's still early days and think's i'll get even better.....so happy days!(hopefully)Just got to rush back home next Monday to speak to the cbt on the phone....bit sceptical about this,anyone have experiance of it?

Edited 20 August 2019 by PAULCFC

[Izzy]

23 hours ago, PAULCFC said:

Went to see the doc.yesterday and he and me are happy to keep me taking the meds at the same dosage.He said it's still early days and think's i'll get even better.....so happy days!(hopefully)Just got to rush back home next Monday to speak to the cbt on the phone....bit sceptical about this,anyone have experiance of it?

Happy days indeed mate 

 

I haven't had CBT personally, but there's plenty on this thread who have. I do understand the principles of CBT and I'm a big fan.

 

It's perfectly normal to be skeptical but I'd just advise you to be open about it. Give it a go, you've really got nothing to lose and everything to gain. 

 

And stick with it. Even if you think it's all BS after a few sessions just complete the course. Sometimes it takes a while for the penny to drop and it all to make sense, so try to resist bailing out too early.

 

Best of luck 

[ozleicester]

because talking helps..