Annoying words or phrases that have crept into football media vocabulary

[Wymsey]

"Unbelievable, Jeff".

[Filbert_Ross]

‘Game time ‘ 

[Tielemans63]

'To be fair'

 

Jermaine Jenas is incapable of saying a sentence without these 3 words at the beginning or end of it.

[StanSP]

whenever McManaman says 'whoops!' like a little kid when a player nutmegs another in a match. Pretty sure he says it without fail whenever he commentates.

[The Quick Brown Fox]

"just about" when a player clears the ball and you hear he "just about" cleared it. Does my head in. He either done enough or he didn't. 

[foxfanazer]

When Shearer says ‘He done that’ instead of ‘he did that’

[foxfanazer]

Anything Paul Merson says 

 

oh and Jimmy Bullard for that matter

Edited 20 January 2018 by foxfanazer

[Carl the Llama]

On 19/01/2018 at 12:30, bovril said:

On 21/03/2017 at 10:45, Beliall said:

Your liverpool's Chelsea's  Leicester's 

Yes yes yes. This is so annoying. 

Extraneous apostrophes are a blight on the game.

[SpacedX]

"Already got the deckchairs out" or "On the beach"

Meaning there's nothing left to play for that season. Small wonder that Thomas Cook sponsored Man City when they were shite then.

 

"Park the bus"

...On the head of the next pundit that says that.

 

"Get in"

When some glory hunting twat in the pub in a Man U shirt that's never been further north than Watford gap roars that in your ear or leaps up and spills your beer.

 

"To ship" or "Shipping goals"

Never understood this - I think of outgoing as opposed to incoming, that is until I recalled all those balls sailing past Ron Robert Zieler - then it made total sense. 

 

"He had acres of space"

 ...A football pitch is equivalent to 4,840 sq. yards which is roughly an acre - so no, he didn't did he.

 

"Could be a cricket score"

Not if you're a regular at Grace Road.

 

Mentioning Peter Odemwingie ievery transfer window

- As obligatory as Santa at Christmas.,.only poor old Pete comes around twice a year. Besides, Mahrez at Charles De Gaulle was far more amusing and humiliating.

 

"Squeaky bum time"

I heard Joey Barton say this only last week about the last five minutes of Liverpool v Man City. Nothing worse than an irritatingly squeaky scouser talking out of his arse.

 

"Stoke is a difficult place to come" 

Too ****ing right it is have you seen the state of the A50 lately or the local women? 

 

"Put in a shift today"

- You'd ****ing hope so on £760 per hr. 

 

"Something in their locker"

...Nivea or ****ing Head and Shoulders?

 

Edited 20 January 2018 by Line-X

[Kitchandro]

I'm sure 'right to go down' has been posted somehwere on this thread but it deserves more than one mention for being the single worst phrase ever uttered about football. Anyone who says it needs to be lynched, or at least prevented from speaking on television.

[Kitchandro]

Shearer used the phrase 'a coming together' on MOTD earlier. That's another hateful one. If one person is in control of the ball and someone else accidentally legs him over it's not 'a coming together', it's a foul you simpleton.

 

'Arm is in an unnatural position' - I blame referees for this, they invent things that aren't in the rule book and the media repeat them like they are.

[Parafox]

When they say "He did excellent" or "He did brilliant", it's EXCELLENTLY/BRILLIANTLY, ffs. 

[Donut]

This isn't a media thing, its a fan reaction thing, but it boils my p*ss

 

Picture the scene. Angry fan on Arsenal fan tv or on the radio. His team are beaten, and he is asked whats wrong with the team. His reaction to what he saw.

 

His response.........."THERES NOTHING THERE"..........or "THERES JUST...NOTHING THERE"

 

What the HELL does this sentence mean? apart from nothing?

 

Youre being asked whats wrong in your opinion. Youre angry. Presumably you think several things are wrong.

 

But lacking the intellect to talk about what the issues are specifically, they trot out "THERES NOTHING THERE"

 

Its a ridiculous sentence spoken by people overcome with rage about nothing they can specifically pinpoint, but want to be angry anyway.

 

[Izzy]

“New Manager bounce”

[Beliall]

not really a phrase, but im sick of commentators and pundits making excuses for the Ref and linesmen. If they make a bad call, they should call them out on it, not say, "well, we have a replay, its a difficult job " etc . **** off

[Corky]

I'm sure it has been said before but "be careful what you wish for". I mean, you're watching crap football, not scoring many goals, losing games and it is a mind-numbingly tedious existence each week but wait, if this manager leaves it could be even worse. 

 

 

[Kitchandro]

They play attractive football = They pass the ball a lot without necessarily getting the near the goal very often

 

It's a difficult place to go = The team that play their home games there are crap but they put 11 men behind the ball for 90 minutes

 

They love their football in that part of the country = They are poorer, more angry and less intelligent in that part of the country

 

He has a cultured left foot = He is left footed

 

More on this developing transfer story as it happens = You already know everything

[Donut]

The belief that because a manager is foreign or hasnt worked in England before, he must be

 

a) Treated with suspicion

b) Criticised for not being born English

c) Ridiculed by pundits who can barely string a sentence together but who "Know the league".......even if they cant pronounce a single players name correctly, or be arsed to

[Stadt]

2 hours ago, Donut said:

The belief that because a manager is foreign or hasnt worked in England before, he must be

 

a) Treated with suspicion

b) Criticised for not being born English

c) Ridiculed by pundits who can barely string a sentence together but who "Know the league".......even if they cant pronounce a single players name correctly, or be arsed to

So basically what you're saying is that you're a huge fan of Paul Merson?

 

 

This thread is basically Adam Hurrey's book, where he deconstructs the absolute shit commentators say.

[notnow john]

Off topic but did anyone else see Motty at the Watford game, he was really struggling to

to climb the steps to his commentary position at the rear of J block.

Hope he has happy retirement.

[Dan LCFC]

On 20/01/2018 at 22:56, Line-X said:

"Already got the deckchairs out" or "On the beach"

Meaning there's nothing left to play for that season. Small wonder that Thomas Cook sponsored Man City when they were shite then.

 

"Park the bus"

...On the head of the next pundit that says that.

 

"Get in"

When some glory hunting twat in the pub in a Man U shirt that's never been further north than Watford gap roars that in your ear or leaps up and spills your beer.

 

"To ship" or "Shipping goals"

Never understood this - I think of outgoing as opposed to incoming, that is until I recalled all those balls sailing past Ron Robert Zieler - then it made total sense. 

 

"He had acres of space"

 ...A football pitch is equivalent to 4,840 sq. yards which is roughly an acre - so no, he didn't did he.

 

"Could be a cricket score"

Not if you're a regular at Grace Road.

 

Mentioning Peter Odemwingie ievery transfer window

- As obligatory as Santa at Christmas.,.only poor old Pete comes around twice a year. Besides, Mahrez at Charles De Gaulle was far more amusing and humiliating.

 

"Squeaky bum time"

I heard Joey Barton say this only last week about the last five minutes of Liverpool v Man City. Nothing worse than an irritatingly squeaky scouser talking out of his arse.

 

"Stoke is a difficult place to come" 

Too ****ing right it is have you seen the state of the A50 lately or the local women? 

 

"Put in a shift today"

- You'd ****ing hope so on £760 per hr. 

 

"Something in their locker"

...Nivea or ****ing Head and Shoulders?

 

Also translated to "is absolutely crap at football but ran a bit"

[Dan LCFC]

15 hours ago, Kitchandro said:

They play attractive football = They pass the ball a lot without necessarily getting the near the goal very often

 

It's a difficult place to go = The team that play their home games there are crap but they put 11 men behind the ball for 90 minutes

 

They love their football in that part of the country = They are poorer, more angry and less intelligent in that part of the country

 

He has a cultured left foot = He is left footed

 

More on this developing transfer story as it happens = You already know everything

"BREAKING NEWS: Alexis Sanchez arrives at training!"

[RoboFox]

When clubs beat teams they're expected to beat, it's a "professional performance." It's almost become a euphemism for "That's what I thought would happen, I have nothing valuable to add" and is used ad nauseum by arse-clowns like Phil Neville. 

 

Also, not football lexicon, per se, but I've noticed an increase in the phrase "a different proposition." Everything is a "different proposition" to everything else, and you're not enlightening anyone by saying it so go back to bed.

[shen]

On 20/1/2018 at 22:11, browniefox said:

"just about" when a player clears the ball and you hear he "just about" cleared it. Does my head in. He either done enough or he didn't. 

 

On 20/1/2018 at 22:48, foxfanazer said:

When Shearer says ‘He done that’ instead of ‘he did that’

Literally the previous post

 

@browniefox is Shearer!

[Detroit Blues]

I'm not sure if this phrase has crept into the British vernacular but anytime i hear someone say "It is what it is," a little part of me dies inside.