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Daggers

The joke thread

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Strokes

Strokes

Posted
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Posted

I work with a Chinese guy called Kim and one time at a works function, we were having a drink and I said to him "Do you ever get fed up of us Westerners saying that all Chinese people look the same"? He replied "Kim's at the bar getting drinks, I'm his wife"

  • Haha 6
Buce

Buce

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Strokes said:

My girlfriend says I’m hopeless at fixing appliances. Well, she’s in for a shock.

 

 

Yeah, but this is supposed to be the Joke Thread, not confessions of a crap sparky...

Alf Bentley

Alf Bentley

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Buce said:

 

Yeah, but this is supposed to be the Joke Thread, not confessions of a crap sparky...

 

Don't wind him up. He's got a short fuse. He might get overheated and blow a gasket.

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notnow john

notnow john

Posted
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Posted

My girlfriend is a dwarf and just lately she's become really down because she thinks 

people are making fun of her .

Tonight , I'm going to make a real effort to cheer her up,I've bought her flowers ,

chocolates and I'm going to run her a nice hot sink!

  • Haha 9
Alf Bentley

Alf Bentley

Posted
Posted (edited)
11 minutes ago, Strokes said:

Shall we tell him he spelt it wrong?  :whistle:

 

If he did, he got lucky: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hohm

"Microsoft Hohm was an online web application by Microsoft that enables consumers to analyze their energy usage and provides energy saving recommendations"

 

Do you reckon he meant "Ohm"? I think you might be right......and I'd just assumed he was super-knowledgeable about techie energy-saving stuff. :rolleyes:

Edited by Alf Bentley
Strokes

Strokes

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Alf Bentley said:

 

If he did, he got lucky: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hohm

"Microsoft Hohm was an online web application by Microsoft that enables consumers to analyze their energy usage and provides energy saving recommendations"

 

Do you reckon he meant "Ohm"? I think you might be right......and I'd just assumed he was super-knowledge about techie energy-saving stuff. :rolleyes:

I’m not having that, if he claims otherwise he is a weasel faced fibber. :D

 

Milo

Milo

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, separator said:

Went to an Indian restaurant last night and had a Pelican Curry.

 

Food was ok, but the bill was enormous!

I was there, too. Had a chicken tarka. It’s like a chicken tikka but a little otter.

  • Haha 1
TiffToff88

TiffToff88

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, separator said:

Went to an Indian restaurant last night and had a Pelican Curry.

 

Food was ok, but the bill was enormous!

 

2 hours ago, Milo said:

I was there, too. Had a chicken tarka. It’s like a chicken tikka but a little otter.

That's Aloo-dicrous pair of puns!

Aus Fox

Aus Fox

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, notnow john said:

My girlfriend is a dwarf and just lately she's become really down because she thinks 

people are making fun of her .

Tonight , I'm going to make a real effort to cheer her up,I've bought her flowers ,

chocolates and I'm going to run her a nice hot sink!

Mate after looking after her like that, I hope she made it worth your while and went up on you.

  • Haha 1
Alf Bentley

Alf Bentley

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Milo said:

I was there, too. Had a chicken tarka. It’s like a chicken tikka but a little otter.

 

Have you tried their Spanish surrealist menu?

 

I ordered a side dish. It was a little otter served on a whole lobster on top of a telephone - a tarka Dalí.

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