Bellend Sebastian Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 I would never turn down a Swedish Fanny. It was an open goal but I still managed to miss it
Mike Oxlong Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 I would never turn down a Swedish Fanny.Ha ha. I give you Fanny Sunneson. The former caddie of Nick Faldo and Henrik Stenson
Merging Cultures Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2015/02/kim-jong-uns-ambitious-new-haircut.html
bovril Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 Are those little pipes below mini hairdryers blowing him with warm air?
bovril Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 Quite amusing. Although I wouldn't say that to their face. http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/feb/20/gay-couple-serving-life-sentences-marry-prison-marriage-full-sutton
Steven Posted 20 February 2015 Posted 20 February 2015 'Looted' safes found in drained River Soar lock http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leicestershire-31552258
Carl the Llama Posted 21 February 2015 Posted 21 February 2015 'Looted' safes found in drained River Soar lock http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leicestershire-31552258 10 grand to clear that? Jesus Christ I should let them know I'd be willing to do it all myself for 9.
Steven Posted 21 February 2015 Posted 21 February 2015 Yoga leads to Satan, says Northern Ireland priest http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/yoga-leads-to-satan-says-northern-ireland-priest-10061463.html
sphericalfox Posted 26 February 2015 Posted 26 February 2015 Tired of blowies in the Burger King toilets and handjobs on the night bus, has our Lamby upped his game?
Beliall Posted 27 February 2015 Posted 27 February 2015 http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/pornhub-turns-masturbation-into-energy-in-bid-to-save-the-planet-10075422.html fap to save the planet (vid NSFW if sound on i guess) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzjeAaLbM5k#t=11
sphericalfox Posted 14 March 2015 Posted 14 March 2015 British Airways flight to Dubai forced to return to Heathrow Airport after 'smelly poo in the toilet' becomes unbearable for passengers A town councillor from Hertfordshire says a British Airways flight to Dubai was forced to return to London due to a foul odour emanating from an overflowing toilet. Hertsmere councillor Abhishek Sachdev, who represents Potters Bar Parkfield, said the seven-hour flight was aborted ‘because of a smelly poo in the toilet’. Cabin crew were unable to fix the problem and the smell became unbearable for passengers seated nearby, forcing the plane to turn around near Brussels and land at Heathrow Airport. Mr Sachdev, a Tory councillor, said the flight departed on time Thursday night and everything seemed fine until the captain made an announcement about 30 minutes after take-off. He told MailOnline Travel: ‘The pilot made an announcement requesting senior cabin crew, and we knew something was a bit odd. ‘About 10 minutes later he said you may have noticed there’s a quite pungent smell coming from one of the toilets. ‘He said it was liquid faecal excrement, those are the words he used. He said it’s not a technical fault with the plane, and he was very adamant about that.’ The captain informed passengers that the plane’s crew had examined the problem, but were unable to fix it. He told them that the plane would be forced to return to London for health and safety reasons. Passengers were initially told that they would board another flight in three hours, but it turned into a 15-hour delay, said Mr Sachdev, who was travelling with his pregnant wife, Rupa, and their two-year-old daughter, Shravani. He said the airline offered an apology and provided hotel accommodation and food vouchers, but claimed BA ground staff were unprepared and told the travellers to contact the Civil Aviation Authority for compensation. Mr Sachdev, who wasn’t seated near the toilet in question, said passengers departed for Dubai yesterday at 1pm. He said: ‘It’s obviously disappointing to lose a whole day of your trip. You might expect it on some random airline, but you wouldn’t expect it from British Airways.’ After the plane landed at Heathrow, the councillor tweeted: ‘Insane! Our BA flight to Dubai returned back to Heathrow because of a smelly poo in the toilet! 15hrs until next flight/’ A British Airways spokesperson told MailOnline Travel: 'We're very sorry for the discomfort to our customers. 'We provided them with hotel accommodation and rescheduled the flight to depart the next day.'
separator Posted 18 March 2015 Posted 18 March 2015 Switzerland's new military radar system identifies cows as enemy targets. http://news-round.com/tag/swiss-radar-mistakes-cows-for-airplane/
Webbo Posted 21 March 2015 Posted 21 March 2015 Meet the gentleman with what is widely considered the world's most unfortunate name - Guilherme Carabagiale F**k. The Brazilian student has the unusual last name - which he insists is actually pronounced 'Foo-kee' - thanks to his German heritage. The talented sportsman insists he isn't ashamed of his name - but admits that he find it easier to be identified by his other surname of Carabagiale when playing college basketball in Canada.
purpleronnie Posted 21 March 2015 Posted 21 March 2015 Meet the gentleman with what is widely considered the world's most unfortunate name - Guilherme Carabagiale F**k. The Brazilian student has the unusual last name - which he insists is actually pronounced 'Foo-kee' - thanks to his German heritage. The talented sportsman insists he isn't ashamed of his name - but admits that he find it easier to be identified by his other surname of Carabagiale when playing college basketball in Canada.
kingcarr21 Posted 25 March 2015 Posted 25 March 2015 http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/gran-pamela-anderson-finds-porn-5395471 What are the odds
Mike Oxlong Posted 25 March 2015 Posted 25 March 2015 http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/gran-pamela-anderson-finds-porn-5395471 What are the odds Ha ha. Fvck me, CJ's let herself go!
Guest MattP Posted 27 March 2015 Posted 27 March 2015 The Cecil Rhodes statue at Cape Town Uni looks like it's going to be pulled down after years of protest from people, a bit strange for me and I actually think the Grauniad hits the nail on the head. http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/mar/25/south-africa-rhodesmustfall-statue A lot of black students were pelting his statue with their own faeces as it became roundly known that he had called Africans 'Sub human'.
davieG Posted 28 March 2015 Posted 28 March 2015 A bit of an areshole but........................ A convicted fraudster used an "ingenious" escape plot to trick prison wardens into letting him go free, a court has heard. Wandsworth inmate Neil Moore was on remand when he used an illicit mobile phone to create a fake email account. He posed as a senior court clerk and sent bail instructions to prison staff, who released him on 10 March 2014. His deception was uncovered when solicitors went to interview him three days later, only to find him gone. Moore, 28, from Ilford, east London, handed himself in three days later. 'Extraordinary inventiveness'Southwark Crown Court heard he had set up a fake web domain which closely resembled that of the court service's official address. He then emailed the prison's custody inbox with instructions for his release. The court heard Moore registered the bogus website in the name of investigating officer Det Insp Chris Soole, giving the address and contact details for the Royal Courts of Justice. Prosecutor Ian Paton said: "A lot of criminal ingenuity harbours in the mind of Mr Moore. The case is one of extraordinary criminal inventiveness, deviousness and creativity, all apparently the developed expertise of this defendant". The judge, Recorder David Hunt QC, described the behaviour as "ingenious" criminality. Voice impersonationMoore had previously used four different aliases to commit fraud worth £1,819,000 in total. Posing as staff from Barclays Bank, Lloyds Bank, and Santander he managed to persuade large organisations to give him vast sums of money. Sometimes he answered calls from victims using a man's voice and then pretended to transfer the call to a colleague before resuming the conversation in a woman's voice, the court heard earlier. He was so convincing police initially co-charged his partner Kristen Moore with the deception. All charges against her have now been dropped. Moore, who has pleaded guilty to eight counts of fraud and one count of escape from lawful custody, will be sentenced on 20 April.
Buce Posted 28 March 2015 Posted 28 March 2015 A bit of an areshole but........................ A convicted fraudster used an "ingenious" escape plot to trick prison wardens into letting him go free, a court has heard. Wandsworth inmate Neil Moore was on remand when he used an illicit mobile phone to create a fake email account. He posed as a senior court clerk and sent bail instructions to prison staff, who released him on 10 March 2014. His deception was uncovered when solicitors went to interview him three days later, only to find him gone. Moore, 28, from Ilford, east London, handed himself in three days later. 'Extraordinary inventiveness' Southwark Crown Court heard he had set up a fake web domain which closely resembled that of the court service's official address. He then emailed the prison's custody inbox with instructions for his release. The court heard Moore registered the bogus website in the name of investigating officer Det Insp Chris Soole, giving the address and contact details for the Royal Courts of Justice. Prosecutor Ian Paton said: "A lot of criminal ingenuity harbours in the mind of Mr Moore. The case is one of extraordinary criminal inventiveness, deviousness and creativity, all apparently the developed expertise of this defendant". The judge, Recorder David Hunt QC, described the behaviour as "ingenious" criminality. Voice impersonation Moore had previously used four different aliases to commit fraud worth £1,819,000 in total. Posing as staff from Barclays Bank, Lloyds Bank, and Santander he managed to persuade large organisations to give him vast sums of money. Sometimes he answered calls from victims using a man's voice and then pretended to transfer the call to a colleague before resuming the conversation in a woman's voice, the court heard earlier. He was so convincing police initially co-charged his partner Kristen Moore with the deception. All charges against her have now been dropped. Moore, who has pleaded guilty to eight counts of fraud and one count of escape from lawful custody, will be sentenced on 20 April. What an extraordinary waste of talent.
bovril Posted 29 March 2015 Posted 29 March 2015 http://www.express.co.uk/news/world/566981/al-Qaeda-discussed-strategies-combat-climate-change Is this the most Daily Express article ever?
sphericalfox Posted 29 March 2015 Posted 29 March 2015 http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/news/east-17-singer-brian-harvey-in-very-desperate-situation-10141812.html Someone buy Harvey a jacket potato will ya!
Alf Bentley Posted 5 April 2015 Posted 5 April 2015 An Argentinian shepherd has died while having sex with a scarecrow that was dressed with lipstick, wig and a strap-on sex toy..... http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/world-news/shepherd-died-while-having-sex-with-scarecrow-dressed-in-wig-and-lipstick-31116685.html?google_editors_picks=true All those real, live sheep available to him and he had to indulge in these sordid fantasies.... Still, it's the way he'd have wanted to go - doing something he loved.
sphericalfox Posted 5 April 2015 Posted 5 April 2015 An Argentinian shepherd has died while having sex with a scarecrow that was dressed with lipstick, wig and a strap-on sex toy..... http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/world-news/shepherd-died-while-having-sex-with-scarecrow-dressed-in-wig-and-lipstick-31116685.html?google_editors_picks=true All those real, live sheep available to him and he had to indulge in these sordid fantasies.... Still, it's the way he'd have wanted to go - doing something he loved.
separator Posted 5 April 2015 Posted 5 April 2015 An Argentinian shepherd has died while having sex with a scarecrow that was dressed with lipstick, wig and a strap-on sex toy..... http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/world-news/shepherd-died-while-having-sex-with-scarecrow-dressed-in-wig-and-lipstick-31116685.html?google_editors_picks=true All those real, live sheep available to him and he had to indulge in these sordid fantasies.... Still, it's the way he'd have wanted to go - doing something he loved. Sounds like an x-rated episode of Worzel Gummidge.
ScouseFox Posted 8 April 2015 Posted 8 April 2015 http://www.goal.com/en/news/13/united-states/2015/04/07/10550162/sean-st-ledger-cant-shake-off-taylor-swift-rumours
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