Depression

[MPH]

1 hour ago, leicsmac said:

Science communication, though I've been looking for most jobs that involve presentation of information in a clear and easy to understand manner, as well as general office administration.

 

I've looked at a few Civil Service jobs - no luck yet, as you say, there appears to be a knack to it that I need to learn more about.

 

 

do you have any interest in Biomedical research? Is that even something you can do? theres a few jobs with regards to that kind of thing, this being an example..

 

https://findajob.dwp.gov.uk/details/13915598

 

 

I also wondered if something like this would be your field?

 

https://findajob.dwp.gov.uk/details/13912033  In particular this part i thought might intrest you for this job.. Space science provides critical data to understand and address global challenges such as climate change, while missions to explore our solar system unite nations and advance humanity’s horizons.

[filthyfox]

Hi peeps....   midnight karaoke followed by 3am Mcds?   All while the wife is asleep?   It's making me feel ****ing fantastic at the time, but shattered any other time of day!

[Xen]

2 hours ago, Trav Le Bleu said:

Pfft, you're both spies!

If I was, the country would be ****ed.

 

Oh, wait...  

[JonnyBoy]

10 hours ago, leicsmac said:

Sort of a crosspost from the Job Hunting thread, apologies for that.

 

Filled out three figures worth of applications and had two interviews so far, and got rejected from the second of them yesterday.

 

Getting knocked back this many times is having a negative effect on my mental health. I know other people claim otherwise, but to me the professional job market in Leicestershire that doesn't involve NHS, teaching or niche work for which you already need 5-10 years experience seems utterly saturated. Relocating again is out of the question.

 

I don't know if there's any specific advice folks might offer, but I think I just wanted to vent for the sake of my own sanity. Just don't know what more I can do and really could do with a win on this matter.

Try and find a recruiter with a good rep that can help, someone who really knows your industry not just a high street agency that recruits anything and everything. Ask any ex-colleagues if they know someone that has helped them in the past and do some research on LinkedIn and reach out to one or two. We aren’t all bad (I am one).

 

feel free to DM me your industry and job and I can do my best to point you in the right direction as I am fairly well connected.

 

Edited 21 February by JonnyBoy

[leicsmac]

5 hours ago, MPH said:

 

 

The absolute hopelessness you feel in that situation is horrible.  its very discouraging and to fight back against the despair is difficult.  it got scary for me as it got very close to not being able to pay the rent at all...I hate you are in this situation and we can only offer advice based on our  limited knowledge of your situation.

 

Have you thought about enlisting the help of an expert  who specializes on writing resumes/CVs? It's possible you are  entering the stage where you're happy to branch out into areas just outside  of your expertise and you might need to tailor your resume for that field so that skills you might have  that might attain to a particular field.. i know one guy who had 4 different resumes  that would highlight different skills  depending on the job he was looking for. He ended up with several job offers. Also, you are clearly a very intelligent person and i  wonder, could it be possible that some bosses are intimidated by that? or could they think that there is no way they'd be able to keep you long term? You might have to dumb yourself down a little bit for any interviews. Obviously,  ive never had to do that  

 

Have you thought about applying  for a job to lead  a charity with a focus on environmental impact? I know thats a cause that's very dear to you and to combine something you care about with a job could be a winner for you.

 

Anyway, don't give up and don't give in to the despair. it will happen!

I appreciate the advice!

 

I think it might be time to find someone who can tailor my CV a little for the field I intend to be involved in, yeah. Not sure about the motivation of bosses, but what you say certainly sounds plausible to me.

 

I'd love a decent job at an NPO like that, but they do seem to be rather rare!

 

 

5 hours ago, MPH said:

 

 

do you have any interest in Biomedical research? Is that even something you can do? theres a few jobs with regards to that kind of thing, this being an example..

 

https://findajob.dwp.gov.uk/details/13915598

 

 

I also wondered if something like this would be your field?

 

https://findajob.dwp.gov.uk/details/13912033  In particular this part i thought might intrest you for this job.. Space science provides critical data to understand and address global challenges such as climate change, while missions to explore our solar system unite nations and advance humanity’s horizons.

Those two positions seem a little higher up the food chain than I might be ready for, but the similar ones advertised with them could be more something that would suit, thank you!

[leicsmac]

1 hour ago, JonnyBoy said:

Try and find a recruiter with a good rep that can help, someone who really knows your industry not just a high street agency that recruits anything and everything. Ask any ex-colleagues if they know someone that has helped them in the past and do some research on LinkedIn and reach out to one or two. We aren’t all bad (I am one).

 

feel free to DM me your industry and job and I can do my best to point you in the right direction as I am fairly well connected.

 

Cheers for the advice!

[filthyfox]

I just need to share this.  It is pretty insignificant to anyone outside this group, or those who don't know about depression....

 

BUT...

 

I've just hoovered my bedroom for the first time in about 3 years!!!

[foxy boxing]

25 minutes ago, filthyfox said:

I just need to share this.  It is pretty insignificant to anyone outside this group, or those who don't know about depression....

 

BUT...

 

I've just hoovered my bedroom for the first time in about 3 years!!!

People who don't suffer from depression or anxiety generally can't understand how hard it is to clean your place, especially hoovering, which I also struggle with. Its not about being lazy. You generally don't know how messy or dirty your place is until someone else points it out. 

[filthyfox]

10 minutes ago, foxy boxing said:

People who don't suffer from depression or anxiety generally can't understand how hard it is to clean your place, especially hoovering, which I also struggle with. Its not about being lazy. You generally don't know how messy or dirty your place is until someone else points it out. 

I just find a complete and utter lack of motivation 

[Parafox]

2 hours ago, filthyfox said:

I just need to share this.  It is pretty insignificant to anyone outside this group, or those who don't know about depression....

 

BUT...

 

I've just hoovered my bedroom for the first time in about 3 years!!!

 

I was talking to a friend who is a newly qualified police officer and we both said that the majority of MH jobs we (police and ambulance) attend are people living in a chaotic way. Food going mouldy in the fridge, piles of unwashed laundry, dusty and grubby rooms, kitchens with a heap of dirty plates and cutlery, a pet that needs food or water, household waste overflowing the bin, dirty toilets and baths, carpets that are visibly covered in dust and pet/human hair and that's relatively mild compared to some places I've seen.

 

For someone with depression and/or anxiety, motivation becomes non-existent and then it's a spiralling descent into a worsening situation where they are unable to keep doing the basics and things literally pile up,

 

Imagine waking up every day to the daunting prospect of sorting the increasingly difficult situation out but you have no desire, because it has overwhelmed you. And your mind isn't telling you how to get things back to "normal", unable to form any kind of plan to tackle or change the situation you are in because you head is full of the illogical thoughts and grinding negativity which take up so much thinking and seems to be incessant. 

 

These people most likely recognise the situation and want it to change, but the effort of doing something is outweighed by the black dog of depression telling them "why bother, nothing matters, I don't matter, I don't care about myself. I'll do it when I feel better... maybe". 

 

The issue can then become, even when feeling better, actively doing something positive becomes a huge effort and for many people the motivation is fleeting and the cycle repeats itself.

 

 

Edited 24 February by Parafox

[Wymsey]

9 minutes ago, Parafox said:

 

I was talking to a friend who is a newly qualified police officer and we both said that the majority of MH jobs we (police and ambulance) attend are people living in a chaotic way. Food going mouldy in the fridge, piles of unwashed laundry, dusty and grubby rooms, kitchens with a heap of dirty plates and cutlery, a pet that needs food or water, household waste overflowing the bin, dirty toilets and baths, carpets that are visibly covered in dust and pet/human hair and that's relatively mild compared to some places I've seen.

 

For someone with depression and/or anxiety, motivation becomes non-existent and then it's a spiralling descent into a worsening situation where they are unable to keep doing the basics and things literally pile up,

 

Imagine waking up every to the daunting prospect of sorting the situation out but you have no desire, because it has overwhelmed you. And your mind isn't telling you how to get things back to "normal", unable to form any kind of plan to tackle or change the situation you are in because you head is full of the illogical thoughts and grinding negativity which take up so much thinking and seems to be incessant. 

 

These people most likely recognise the situation and and want it to change but the effort of doing something is outweighed by the black dog of depression telling them "why bother, nothing matters, I don't matter, I don't care about myself. I'll do it when I feel better... maybe". 

 

The issue can then become, when feeling better, actively doing something positive becomes a huge effort and for many people the motivation is fleeting and the cycle repeats itself.

 

 

That's very insightful and reckon there's a lot of people out there in this situation.

-

Is your daughter/step-daughter OK currently, given her mental health struggles may I ask?

[Parafox]

This is worth a read:

 

I Had a Black Dog: His Name Was Depression by Matthew Johnstone | Goodreads

[Parafox]

35 minutes ago, Wymsey said:

That's very insightful and reckon there's a lot of people out there in this situation.

-

Is your daughter/step-daughter OK currently, given her mental health struggles may I ask?

 

It's been pretty bad over the last few months.

 

She has been becoming more psychotic and reclusive, convinced that neighbours are still getting into her flat even though she has had the locks changed.

 

She believes we have been complicit in messing with her mind, that we have been in contact with the MH team to try to get her sectioned (we haven't), that we have always lied to her about various bad things that have happened in her life, that we want her to be evicted, so we have been winding her up to the point of her wanting to stab someone and go to prison. That we want the Housing association to kill her cat, who is a companion pet, so that she has nothing left in her life...

 

Because she is paranoid about people getting into her flat, she has refused to allow the housing association access to do a gas safety check so they cut her gas off and she has had no heating or hot water for a month. She has an electric heater which scorched the carpet because she is unable to think logically or anticipate possibilities, and could've set fire to the place.

 

In the last few weeks we have received over 300 texts a day from her going over and over and repeating every accusation and verbal attack towards us.

 

We went over last week as she seemed reasonable and she asked us to help her with making her flat accessible and she'd then let the housing people in.

 

The amount of waste, kitchen waste, cat litter waste (bagged up, fortunately) food containers, (she won't go out to the shop so has been living off take-aways) was jaw dropping. Then there's her problem with what we call over-buying. She buys things daily from eBay, Amazon etc that get delivered to her flat, spending most of her benefits on stuff she doesn't need but that makes her feel better about herself when it arrives. There is a fairly large "utility" space/cupboard where her gas boiler is and where she keeps shoes and coats etc. About the size of a downstairs cloakroom. We opened the doo and it was LITERALLY full to the ceiling with cardboard packaging and polystyrene fillers.

 

It took us over an hour to clear all this away and the car was full of stuff after we had filled her household and recycling bins.

 

She thanked us and wanted us to stay and talk but she managed to manufacture an argument and became quite hostile so we had to leave.

 

It's just so difficult to see someone we care about in the depths of he MH and be unable to help even though we have tried through various avenues, GP. her MH team, the crisis team, the police when she's threatened to harm herself, none of whom could actually do anything unless she did something first.

 

Thanks for asking. We carry on and continue to do what we can, when we can and acknowledge her MH issues which, in a way, makes it bearable.

Edited 24 February by Parafox

[urban.spaceman]

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

[urban.spaceman]

****'s sake

[HighPeakFox]

3 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

You stop drinking and look within.

[MaidstoneFox]

15 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

Be proud of what you have done and keep trying to improve (that mark was amazing). Focus on the positives. Being a good friend is a learning process, so don't be surprised if friends let you down now and then. Set your own standards and try to model how you'd like to be treated, some of that will rub off on others.

 

I'm 54 now. I've had awful times in my 20s; 30s and 40s much better, but now things are terrible because of loss and divorce. However, I know I have to look after myself first and foremost and then I'm in a position to look after and be good to others.

[MPH]

16 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

 

Honestly, I think there’s a massive lack of awareness and understanding even in today’s age about depression and how to handle it  and how to respond  to it as a friend. I really hope there isn’t any willful ignorance going on on their part  and there’s no “ screw him” type stuff… I really hope it’s more that they haven’t got a clue and are just unaware what to say, do, or react. So yeah  they sound a bit rubbish in that department…but have you sat down and told them about how things are of you and how you suffer and what your dark days are like? I can imagine that would be a massive step and development in your friendship and it’s very hard to make yourself intentionally vulnerable to your friends like that… but one of the steps.. or building blocks in living with depression and to lessen the times it can stick the knife in is being a little bit proactive in your self care or at least making yourself vulnerable to your friends.. so they know how to help you. 
 

I know that can all come across a bit presumptive and I really don’t know the stage of friendship you’re at with them. So I’m sorry if that comes across as a bit obnoxious.. I just hope even a little of it can resonate a bit with you? Or make you think to find out if there’s anything you can do to help the situation?

 

 

The reality is there’s less than 10 people on this website who I  really lookout for.. it could be I find them funny, or I like the fact they are genuine people or  agree with them on some things or I see their struggles and it hurts my heart.. or it could be a mixture of all of the above.but you’re definitely one of them. So don’t give up.. try your absolute best to regroup and give it another go!

[Izzy]

17 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

I think most people are too wrapped up in their own stuff so I wouldn't take it personally mate.

 

But this post has really got me thinking about how does one really define what a 'friend' is?

 

As a kid I had loads of friends but now as a middle aged grumpy old cvnt, I don't think I've really got any friends as such.

 

I've got a few what I would call 'acquaintances' that I play golf with and some blokes I know from back in the day, but could I truly rely on them if the shit hit the fan for me? I dunno if I could...

 

Maybe it's an age thing, maybe it's me, and maybe not having any true friends means there's no expectation or disappointment if I'm let down. 

 

The only people I can truly rely on in life are probably my wife, sister, and Mum & Dad if I think about it.

 

And I'm O.K. with that.

 

[Trav Le Bleu]

On 24/02/2024 at 17:23, foxy boxing said:

People who don't suffer from depression or anxiety generally can't understand how hard it is to clean your place, especially hoovering, which I also struggle with. Its not about being lazy. You generally don't know how messy or dirty your place is until someone else points it out. 

The clue's in his username, eh @filthyfox

[Daggers]

18 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Has anyone ever had the innate feeling of telling your closest so-called friends what a ****ing disappointment they've been to you?

 

Had a really good start to the week. Got a provisional grade back for my short film script module (an original screenplay of 15 pages of my own concept) and it was 75/100. I was initially disappointed before I realised this a) the highest grade in anything I've ever had and b) higher than my fellow students, 2 of whom have extensive experience in the industry.

 

Sent my oldest friends this news the other day in our group - one lives 5 miles away, the other 5,500; one hasn't bothered responding while the other one expressed confusion about grading despite working in education. I haven't even bothered telling my oldest friend because the only time he's contacted me in the last months is about money for a gig we're going to next year and ****ing digital invite to his wedding in ****ING LATVIA. No acknowledgment of my poverty, nothing about my course, no call, no text, no call, no ****ing help. What a ****.

 

So that was Monday. Tuesday I applied for the biggest job I've ever applied for, then Thursday I submitted my short script to a competition.

 

Friday I went down to London, the after getting back to St Pancras I discovered I'd managed to book the return section of travel for ****ing Saturday, leaving me stranded in London for the night. Ended up managing to get a train (3 hours long) via Peterborough that cost me an unexpected £30; I am already behind by a month on my tuition and every ****ing penny counts, but nothing is going or me at all and I've lurched back into alcholism as a result.

 

I had such a positive start to this week but it's ended ****ing miserably and it's cost me a few bottles of spirits as aresutl.

 

anyway.

 

How do you tell your friends they're useless cvnts without losing them forever?

Hun, the only thing you control is you. 
 

My deep dive into the wonderful world of depression lost me all the friends who were scared of the apparently contagious person I became. Almost all of the remaining ones seemed intent on keeping the toxic parts of me I needed to divest myself of. 
 

So, no, I’ve not had to tell them anything, I’ve just had to cut them from my life as I worked towards a healthier, positive life. 
 

And my circle of friends got very small. 
 

And my family got smaller. 
 

I’ve now cut my parents and brother. They are unable to see me as the person I’ve become - and continuing to treat me as the way I was is poison. 
 

And, after too many years, I’ve cut my wife this week. She can’t let go of the person she thinks I am, she can’t stop trying to force me to be in need. She can’t handle change. 
 

TLDR: lose them forever. If they can’t be a positive part of your life then they’re toxic. 

[Trav Le Bleu]

45 minutes ago, Izzy said:

I think most people are too wrapped up in their own stuff so I wouldn't take it personally mate.

 

But this post has really got me thinking about how does one really define what a 'friend' is?

 

As a kid I had loads of friends but now as a middle aged grumpy old cvnt, I don't think I've really got any friends as such.

 

I've got a few what I would call 'acquaintances' that I play golf with and some blokes I know from back in the day, but could I truly rely on them if the shit hit the fan for me? I dunno if I could...

 

Maybe it's an age thing, maybe it's me, and maybe not having any true friends means there's no expectation or disappointment if I'm let down. 

 

The only people I can truly rely on in life are probably my wife, sister, and Mum & Dad if I think about it.

 

And I'm O.K. with that.

 

I'm your friend mate!

 

Kinda.

[Trav Le Bleu]

1 hour ago, MPH said:

 

Honestly, I think there’s a massive lack of awareness and understanding even in today’s age about depression and how to handle it  and how to respond  to it as a friend. I really hope there isn’t any willful ignorance going on on their part  and there’s no “ screw him” type stuff… I really hope it’s more that they haven’t got a clue and are just unaware what to say, do, or react.

I'd say it's most likely... which means they might still be a friend, just not a good or close friend.

 

Telling people that they're ########## usually isn't very productive, even if it's true. Will it make you feel better? Maybe, in the short term, but these things come back to bite you. It's likely you share common acquaintances, so you give someone a diatribe of vitriol, likelihood is they're going to say to someone who knows you both, "you know what @urban.spaceman said to me..." and thus the legend grows.

 

I'm not saying that's right, just that it happens. People are human, if you **** them, do they not bleed?

 

Lastly, I dunno, but when you told them how you were doing @urban.spaceman, did you enquire how they were doing? Much more likely to elicit a response and here's my marker, if you DID do that and they didn't get back to you, then that's being a poor friend. However, message them again, maybe they had something dramatic happen in their life and amongst that your message got missed or put on a back burner .

 

As Pete and Kate once said, don't give up.

[Trav Le Bleu]

Just now, Trav Le Bleu said:

I'd say it's most likely... which means they might still be a friend, just not a good or close friend.

 

Telling people that they're ########## usually isn't very productive, even if it's true. Will it make you feel better? Maybe, in the short term, but these things come back to bite you. It's likely you share common acquaintances, so you give someone a diatribe of vitriol, likelihood is they're going to say to someone who knows you both, "you know what @urban.spaceman said to me..." and thus the legend grows.

 

I'm not saying that's right, just that it happens. People are human, if you **** them, do they not bleed?

 

Lastly, I dunno, but when you told them how you were doing @urban.spaceman, did you enquire how they were doing? Much more likely to elicit a response and here's my marker, if you DID do that and they didn't get back to you, then that's being a poor friend. However, message them again, maybe they had something dramatic happen in their life and amongst that your message got missed or put on a back burner .

 

As Pete and Kate once said, don't give up.

Ha! The website *****ed my writing the word p r I c k

 

[Lionator]

Really struggling at the minute. Been watching too much news, I’ve found myself stocking up cans and tins in case of a conflict between ourselves and Russia. I can’t seem to switch my head off of it and thinking to myself there’s only one way to avoid it. I think I can talk myself out of doing anything stupid but it’s really hard not to get consumed.