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Pinkman

Depression

By Pinkman, in General Chat

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MPH

MPH

Posted
Posted

@FoxesDeb that’s truly heart breaking. I’m so so sorry :cry: I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say that you are one of us  and you can vent in here as much and as often as you want to.. even if it’s just to get the words out and ‘ on paper’  rather than to really be seeking help.

 

 

Much love to you xxx

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StanSP

StanSP

Posted
Posted

I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through @FoxesDeb. That's so tragic and just cannot imagine how you're feeling.

 

I hope you find the strength and belief to continue for your family. They need you as much as you need them in this moment. 

 

Sending love and prayers to you. If you need to chat just send a PM any time. 

 

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Raj

Raj

Posted
Posted (edited)

@FoxesDeb

No words from any of us can help in any way I'm sure. Can only pray that your family and yourself somehow cope and get through together.

🙏❤

Edited by Raj
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Guest leatherhead32

Guest leatherhead32

Posted
Posted
14 hours ago, FoxesDeb said:

I need to write this somewhere, partly to let those of you who have noticed I haven't been around lately the reason why, and partly just to write it somewhere I suppose.

 

My youngest son died last month, he was 20 years old and he took his own life completely unexpectedly. He had absolutely everything to live for, a job he loved, a girlfriend who was besotted with him and him with her, a loving family, and it's completely broken me. Everyone thinks their kids are great, but a funnier, kinder, well mannered and level headed young lad you could not hope to meet.

 

I don't see the point in anything anymore really, and if it wasn't for my husband and other son and daughter I would have already left to be with him. I live about 500m from the sea and the temptation to just walk into it is almost overwhelming at times, I feel so sad that he's on his own,  I'm so angry with him for leaving me like this, and I miss him immeasurably. Every parent has moments wondering what it must be like to lose a child, and it's absolutely horrific.

 

The way I view everything has changed, I can't listen to music, can't watch things on TV that might bring any kind of reminder, and what I do try to watch as a distraction I'm not really watching, I'm just thinking about his last moments, what he must have been thinking and feeling, wondering all sorts of awful things really.

 

F1 was our thing together and I can't bear to see any mention of it anywhere, I can't watch our games because it just seems so frivolous and reminds me of all the times my son and I spent together at the KP, I can't look at his photos, the list is endless and I don't know if it will ever be any better than this. Everything just seems so completely pointless. My daughter shares the same birthday as him, this November she will turn 18 on the same day he would have turned 21, what a fvcking day that's going to be.

 

We all think these things happen to other people, until they happen to us. If anyone here has been through similar you have my complete sympathy, hopefully it doesn't feel like this forever but I can't imagine when it will change, and then I also feel guilty for not wanting to feel like this forever. However awful I might have previously imagined something like this to be was absolutely nowhere remotely close to how it actually feels, I wouldn't wish this on anyone. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

so sorry for your loss to all family , cant add more. very sad to read. take care mrs.

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Sampson

Sampson

Posted
Posted

Wow. Of course nothing anyone can say can bring comfort, but reading a post like that from FoxesDeb brings it all home how all the other stuff outside of spending time with friends and family is just noise that gets in the way of what is really important.
 

Really heartbreaking to read and I guess a timely reminder of that we never know when the last time we’ll see our loved ones will be so make the most of our time with them while we can. 
 

Just hope you and your family can eventually find ways to cope with it all FoxesDeb.  

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SpacedX

SpacedX

Posted
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It's so hard to know what to write here - or to say anything that hasn't been said. I would however like to echo this...

 

4 hours ago, HighPeakFox said:

and I can only hope that writing this down here is one step closer to a better day for you. 

The healing process may never be complete, but your daughter needs her wonderful Mother more that ever. May the memory of your dear departed son be a reminder of your fine parenthood, your love and devotion.

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Wymsey

Wymsey

Posted
Posted (edited)

I feel the urge to donate to a mental health charity after reading Deb's post.

 

Would it be appropriate for us, as fellow posters, to club together?..

 

@FoxesDeb, if there's a charity/organisation us fellow members can donate to - in memory of your son - please share with us. Thanks.

Edited by Wymsey
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HighPeakFox

HighPeakFox

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9 minutes ago, Wymsey said:

I feel the urge to donate to a mental health charity after reading Deb's post.

Would it be appropriate for us, as fellow posters, to club together?..

Entirely appropriate I think.

 

I only wish more people came to this thread - it reminds us all what it is to be human.

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Jattdogg

Jattdogg

Posted
Posted

@FoxesDeb

 

Just had a birthday party for both my kids yesterday.  My daughter is sat next to me cuddling and just hugged her with a kiss. Can't imagine how you feel nor your family. Hug your kids, cats, dogs everyone.

 

All i can say is, one day at a time and reach out to anyone willing to chat (myself included).

 

I pray/hope in due time you find solace in your sons pictures/videos and your memories.

 

Much love from my family to yours.

 

 

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BertFill

BertFill

Posted
Posted

@FoxesDeb I can hardly even begin to imagine what you and your family must be going through. Even though we've never met, as a parent of a 20 year old son myself your post affected me more than I would have expected; all I can do is send you all the love and sympathy I have - and the certainty that one day the pain will become less unrelenting, although I know it won't feel like that's possible at the moment.

 

So very, unexpressably sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you and yours.

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Parafox

Parafox

Posted
Posted

I simply don't know what to say.

 

Thoughts are with you. It doesn't help much, I know. I can't imagine what you're feeling or going through. 

 

I only know you from FT but nevertheless I am so sorry for your loss. Really, genuinely sorry. Really sad for you and your family. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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HighPeakFox

HighPeakFox

Posted
Posted
24 minutes ago, BertFill said:

Can an admin change it? If Deb sees that it would be really upsetting.

 

Obviously admins if you can remove the emoji you can just delete this post of mine.

I'd like to think she'd probably know it was a mistake.

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