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bovril

Unpopular Opinions You Hold

By bovril, in General Chat

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Izzy

Izzy

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Posted

All this talk of holding hands...

 

I have to confess that me and the wife always hold hands when out in public.

 

People think it’s cute that we’re still in love after all these years, but the real reason is that if I let go she’ll just nip off and start shopping...

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The Bear

The Bear

Posted
Posted

I don't like seeing blokes kissing either. It also makes me feel uncomfortable. If I see a bloke's arse on a TV show I have to turn away! Hand holding is fine, it's just the sexual/physical side of it, and for no logical reason why. I have known several gay people, have played in band with one gay guy, and worked with a lesbian too. We got on perfectly well.

That's not having outdated views IMO, it's just down to how your brain is wired to find certain things physically appealing or not. Sexuality is a spectrum, not black and white. Some people are comfortable with blokes being physical, others aren't, depending how far you are down each end of the spectrum. I'm sure there are some gay people put there who think a guy/girl kissing looks weird to them too.

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Finnegan

Finnegan

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Posted
2 minutes ago, The Bear said:

I don't like seeing blokes kissing either. It also makes me feel uncomfortable. If I see a bloke's arse on a TV show I have to turn away! Hand holding is fine, it's just the sexual/physical side of it, and for no logical reason why. I have known several gay people, have played in band with one gay guy, and worked with a lesbian too. We got on perfectly well.

That's not having outdated views IMO, it's just down to how your brain is wired to find certain things physically appealing or not. Sexuality is a spectrum, not black and white. Some people are comfortable with blokes being physical, others aren't, depending how far you are down each end of the spectrum. I'm sure there are some gay people put there who think a guy/girl kissing looks weird to them too.

 

Think that's a bit of a kop out to be honest. There's definitely a good argument for nature vs nurture in sexual attraction and most people can't be held accountable for their tastes. 

 

But I think "I can't help it if two men kissing makes me uncomfortable, it's just the way my brain is wired" is more than unhelpfully denying flaws in your psyche that can most likely be addressed and corrected and are probably there from social conditioning more than any biological predisposition. 

 

 

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The Bear

The Bear

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Posted (edited)

Growing up, none of my friends or family have ever made that feeling known to my knowledge. It's just something I've always disliked the look of from since I can remember first seeing it. It's a physical repulsion more than any kind of moral issue with it, which is why I put it down to sexuality. It's not like previous generations who weren't tolerant of gay people in any shape or form. I don't mind the concept of two blokes/women being gay, I just find the physical act unappealing.   

 

Who knows, maybe TV or films has skewed my thinking, but then again, if that were true I guess a lot more people would find it the case too. 

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Innovindil

Innovindil

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17 minutes ago, Finnegan said:

 

Think that's a bit of a kop out to be honest. There's definitely a good argument for nature vs nurture in sexual attraction and most people can't be held accountable for their tastes. 

 

But I think "I can't help it if two men kissing makes me uncomfortable, it's just the way my brain is wired" is more than unhelpfully denying flaws in your psyche that can most likely be addressed and corrected and are probably there from social conditioning more than any biological predisposition. 

 

 

What sort of psyco babble nonsense is this. People have their own tastes, feeling uncomfortable watching 2 men snogging could be the same for him as me getting uncomfortable seeing a man snog a whale of a woman, or seeing a pair of whale people snogging. Or getting uncomfortable seeing someone getting spanked wearing a gimp mask. 

 

Chances are if something sexual doesn't coincide with your preferences, it will make you feel uncomfortable. Doesn't mean you are conditioned to dislike it, you could genuinely just dislike it. 

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Captain...

Captain...

Posted
Posted
27 minutes ago, The Bear said:

Growing up, none of my friends or family have ever made that feeling known to my knowledge. It's just something I've always disliked the look of from since I can remember first seeing it. It's a physical repulsion more than any kind of moral issue with it, which is why I put it down to sexuality. It's not like previous generations who weren't tolerant of gay people in any shape or form. I don't mind the concept of two blokes/women being gay, I just find the physical act unappealing.   

 

Who knows, maybe TV or films has skewed my thinking, but then again, if that were true I guess a lot more people would find it the case too. 

I still find it odd to see 2 men kissing, more so than straight couples, it is still not that common. It is natural when you see something unusual that it triggers a reaction, and  people have different reactions, but a common reaction to seeing something strange is to stare at it. It's just your brain trying to figure it out. The problem is we know that it is not socially acceptable to stare at 2 people kissing so you get a conflict of your brain going, "ooh what's that" and your social conscious saying "don't stare at it!" that makes you feel uncomfortable and want to look away which you may interpret as disgust.

 

I think it will become a generational thing, a lot of us grew up when it was still not common or really acceptable for gay men to go to non gay clubs and kiss. It was very much a rarity when I was "clubbing" whereas seeing straight couples snogging and grinding up against each other in Krystals was common place. Once you get past the clubbing/pulling stage you don't really see much snogging going on in real life. Because I have witnessed Leicester's finest boys and girls dry humping to S Club 7 it is normalised some what in a way that seeing gay men acting the same hasn't been. So it becomes a curiosity in your mind, but like an itch you can't scratch, the fact that you know you shouldn't stare and shouldn't be interested in what other people are up to makes you feel uncomfortable.

 

However the fact you have to look away when you see a mans bottom on the TV is just a bit weird, how do you watch porn?

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Carl the Llama

Carl the Llama

Posted
Posted
11 minutes ago, Wymeswold fox said:

Feel as if a sense of bullying is happening here tbh, and not surprised it's MTWG (not the first time he's done it, dome it with others in the past trying to get a reaction..).

I thought it was a funny take on one of the memes du jour, sorry if it's caused offence.

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sk3since03

sk3since03

Posted
Posted
On 29/10/2017 at 12:31, FIF said:

To give Wymsey a break:

 

I hold the opinion that single people shouldn't be funded by the state to have kids. (I also believe that couples shouldn't be but that might not get the heat off Wymsey). If you want children, great, but don't expect others to pay for what you want. If you can't afford to have kids then don't have them.

I agree 

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Milo

Milo

Posted
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55 minutes ago, Wymeswold fox said:

Feel as if a sense of bullying is happening here tbh, and not surprised it's MTWG (not the first time he's done it, dome it with others in the past trying to get a reaction..).

I despise bullies as much as I despise homophobes - and I don't think either of you are either of those things. 

 

Saying that, I think this whole episode could've been handled a little bit better. You posted a view on this particular thread which, I assume, you knew would be controversial. No problem with that...the clue is in the thread title. 

 

But if people react strongly and aggressively to your opinions, I suggest either laughing it off or putting forward supporting arguments to encourage people to see your point of view and why you have that particular take on life. 

 

Just saying. 

 

Peace 

 

 

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Izzy

Izzy

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Wymeswold fox said:

Feel as if a sense of bullying is happening here tbh, and not surprised it's MTWG (not the first time he's done it, dome it with others in the past trying to get a reaction..).

Mate, I get bullied to fvck all the time on the joke thread.

 

This forum is relentless, cruel and nasty sometimes (but I still love it)

 

The only way to deal with it is to stand your ground and give as good as you get I find...

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The Doctor

The Doctor

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Innovindil said:

What sort of psyco babble nonsense is this. People have their own tastes, feeling uncomfortable watching 2 men snogging could be the same for him as me getting uncomfortable seeing a man snog a whale of a woman, or seeing a pair of whale people snogging. Or getting uncomfortable seeing someone getting spanked wearing a gimp mask.

 

Chances are if something sexual doesn't coincide with your preferences, it will make you feel uncomfortable. Doesn't mean you are conditioned to dislike it, you could genuinely just dislike it. 

Mild displays of public affection are hardly comparable to that... There's a big difference between sexual acts, or even French kissing, and two blokes holding hands or a light kiss. If you are genuinely uncomfortable at two men/women giving a PDA that you wouldn't be if it were a hetero couple, then you need to ask why (and not give the old rubbish of latent homosexual desires), and typically it's because you were implicitly told that it was wrong as a kid, not because it does nothing for you. 

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